I'm not sure which category to put this in. One year ago my Dr. put me on Lexipro because of trying to deal with my new life change of moving in with my mom. (husband came too, but he's Never a problem ). Well on came the weight, I felt hopeless but well enough to eat and not care about it. I stopped the med in January and started to see a counselor. He really helped me to navigate through some issues and supported me on some future plans. Such as boundaries and asking siblings for a break. My mom can be sweet or a royal pain. I can't seem to get a better handle on the boundary issue. She has a separate 2 room addition. She just won't keep that darn door shut! And she is safe to be alone. She is constantly coming in to my house for bogus excuses just to see what I'm doing. She asked me yesterday if she was in jail because I keep the door shut. I find myself hiding on her with a bag of chips , cookies whatever is around. Then I feel even worse and blame her, then vow to not get sucked into her trap. But why do I keep putting my finger in the socket?? She is active at the senior center a few days a week, I drop her off and she takes the bus home. One day a week they even pick her up to go grocery shopping. It's like if she doesn't go out every single day she's in my face wanting to know what my plans are for the day. And I do take her out a few times a week, sometimes I just want to be alone.
I'm no expert, but, when I started to focus on my nutrition, I actually looked up what each thing had that I ate and logged my calories. I was shocked. It enabled me to see just what I was consuming and why I had gained weight. Also, check with your doctor on thyroid. That and some other conditions and medications can cause weight gain.
Soothing oneself with yummy goodies will tend to put on those unhealthy pounds! As I understand it, some medications can compound that. I try to avoid medication whenever possible. Years ago, unrelated to any care-giving, I had put on some weight (but it was not really excessive or noticeable to others, just me.) I had not had a physical in about 5 years (just too busy being a mom and working full time.) When I did go, I was told my cholesterol was very high and I would have to take meds. NO NO NO!! At that time the recommendations they had for tackling this with or without medication was of no help and I had to figure it out myself. Processed foods. Frozen dinners. Basically anything with a shelf life (includes so-called healthy foods like granola bars. Even worse, suspect anything that boasts LOW OR FAT-FREE; these have to replace the fat with something to make it tasty, so they use some form of SUGAR!)
Anyway, one of the things I did was join a gym at work that they had recently opened at that time. I did NOT do any weights or classes, just the treadmill. Personally if I had the option to walk during the day, I would have preferred walking outside (and it is FREE!) I started out with just a normal, good pace, not a stroll. Maybe like 2 miles, about 20 minutes. About every two weeks I would not break a sweat so I would up the pace and the incline each time. The goal was to reduce cholesterol (which about 4-5 weeks of eliminating the crap, making my own meals, salad with chicken for work, making my own granola reduced it by a lot.) The bonus? In addition to getting the cholesterol ratios to a good place, I also lost about 20 pounds, which had been gained by eating those frozen dinners for lunch and those so-called healthy snacks.
Since your mom is at the senior center several days/week and goes grocery shopping with them, THAT can be your time to get out and WALK! It does not hurt to treat yourself with some goodies now and then, especially when you start making progress, but if you can walk a brisk pace outside or go to a gym and use the treadmill, you get several perks: burn off excess energy (for others who are stressed with care-giving, think STRESS RELEASE!), get fresh air, have time away from mom (ME time) and over time the weight loss (of course you will have to try to ditch the cookies and chips, except for special occasions!) Time it and every few weeks up the pace to try to beat your time! Raw baby carrots make a good cookie substitute (for the crunch, not so much the taste.) Other veggies raw, think veggie platters, maybe with a decent not-so-fat dip sometimes, are a better option. I never bothered with calorie counting. Eat healthy foods (keep as close to nature as possible) and MOVE usually works (unless there is an underlying medical issue - you should get a check up before starting any exercise regimen!) Actually, now that I think about it, your mom does not need you to be there all the time even when she is home - when you need to get away, put on a sweater or coat and take a walk outside instead of hibernating in your room with the naughty snacks! Extra calorie burning!
I need to get back to this myself. Although I do not provide hands-on care giving for mom, I do (try) to handle all the rest of it (bills, juggling money to be sure everything is covered, tons of paperwork to get SS, pension, IRS so that I get the paperwork, and apply for VA benefits, visiting mom, responding to issues that come up including falls or needed supplies, in addition to trying to coordinate my brothers to help clean out and fix her condo so we can rent it and have more money for her memory care!) Just that alone is stressful, when trying to get my own tasks, house repairs, snow removal, etc done. When do I get to enjoy MY retirement??? When is MY me time? Since money is tight for me, I do not get out often enough to get fresh veggies (frozen for some), so the healthier eating is still trying to get worked out. I may check into a local gym in 2018, as my medicare advantage plan says it covers this... I cannot do a lot because of vertebrae that slip out of place in my lower back, but perhaps just that treadmill again (my street is too much up/down to try that... yet. Plus, if I get into a bind, I might not be able to walk back home, whereas the treadmill I just have to get off it and back to my car!)
RayLin - agreed snacking is better than boozing or smoking, however excess weight can lead to health crises for you, including your premature demise, just like those other nasty habits can lead to - where does that leave hubby? You really should try to do something - I understand your difficulty leaving the home, and I certainly do know it is harder to get motivated when at home (too many distractions) but as others have said in other threads, put that oxygen mask on yourself first so that you can help others!