Hello, I am my mother in laws caretaker. I had to quit my job to stay with her. She has Diabetes and Epilepsy with early signs do Dimensia. She is only 62 years old. Every time I run the laundry I ask if she has anything she would like me to wash, the answer is usually no. I take it upon my self to sniff, as unpleasant as it is, her clothing and was what needs to be done. Her husband passed almost 3 years ago and since then she stopped showering or changing her clothing. She gets very upset when I try, nicely, to discuss it with her. I'm getting to the point where I just wash everything each time I do laundry. Also, she thinks she only needs a shower once a month. I know she has a fear of slipping and I have done the best I can to prevent that with a chair, mat and handles in the shower. I have offered to go in with her, that didn't go well. She is still somewhat mentally capable but stubborn. I would love to hear how others handle these things. I don't want to push her too much because stress causes her seizures.
Would that work?
At times I have asked her why she resists showering so much - her response? "I'm lazy, OK?!?" Oookayyy then.
As for how to get her to bathe, she may be uncomfortable having you help her in the shower because she knows you and your are family. Have you thought about hiring a bath aide? You can talk to her Dr. about it and Medicare will cover it. Bath aides are wonderful, they're professional and they're QUICK! Your mom will be in and out in under 30 minutes.
My dad stopped showering because he was afraid he'd fall and we both agreed that I wouldn't help him so I got him a bath aide. She came twice a week and we were happy as clams.