Mom and Dad's assisted living flooded last night after a sprinkler line froze and burst in the ceiling out in the hallway. Thirty rooms with 2 inches of water in the floor. Two below zero last night in WV!
Luckily my BIL and nephew had just walked in the door. They got folks to the lobby, found dry socks and stayed with them for about 4 hours as the flood fighter crews cleaned up the mess. Mom seemed to take it all in stride but Dad was a mess, continually going out to get his car. My 16 year old nephew has become the "Grandpa Whisperer”. He was great with Dad all night wrangling and diverting him.
AND THEN........
About 1am the night nurse noticed that mom was turned around in her bed, head at the foot of the bed, and Dad was sitting on the bed with her. Mom had a bad cut above her eye. Both were confused about what happened. She thought at first Dad might have hit mom but looking at the cut it appeared she had fallen and hit the metal bed frame or something very solid. We’ll probably never know.
So off to local er, they found that she had a fracture around her eye so now off to big city hospital for full exam. RE told me she was comfortable, in no pain and resting.
Dad will be a mess but AL staff doesn’t seem worried. Nurse said if he gets really bad they could put him in memory care unit temporarily.
Have know idea where this is all heading but I could be heading south soon.
Dad was visiting with her as we were speaking, enjoying some hot chocolate (This is new thing for Dad. My guess is staff have discovered sugary way for Dad diversion) and telling her hunting/fishing stories. Dad has no problem flirting with the ladies. She told me they were trying to get him out of the room more, keep him busy and give mom some quiet time. I LOVE THESE GUYS!
Mom was napping and all was well at the moment. I was going to try and talk to them as it’s been 2 weeks but decided not to stir up calm waters. Just let Dad flirt, mom nap, not be confronted by evil son who put them in prison.
Rhymes with everyday.
Barb....your playin' my hubby's song! I just sang all your words.
Yeah, my taste in music and women drove my folks half wild
Mom and dad had a plan for me, it was debutantes and, ah, symphonies
But I like my music, how I like my women wild.
Yeah, and I like my women just a little on the trashy side.
When they wear their clothes too tight and their hair is dyed.
Too much lipstick and, ah, too much rouge
Gets me excited, leaves me feeling confused
And I like my women just a little on the trashy side.
You should have seen the looks on the faces of my dad and mom
When I showed up at the door with my date for the senior prom
They said, "Well, pardon us, son, she ain't no kid!
That's a cocktail waitress in a Dolly Pardon wig!"
I said, "I know it, Dad. Ain't she cool! That's the kind I dig!"
Yeah, and I like my women just a little on the trashy side.
When they wear their clothes too tight and their hair is dyed.
Too much lipstick and, ah, too much rouge
Gets me excited, leaves me feeling confused
And I like my women just a little on the trashy side.
I like 'em sweet, I like 'em with a heart of gold
Yeah, and I like 'em brassy, I like 'em brazen and bold
Well, they say that opposites attract, well I don't agree
I want a woman just as tacky as me
Yeah, I like my women just a little on the trashy side.
Yeah, and I like my women just a little on the trashy side.
When they wear their clothes too tight and their hair is dyed.
Too much lipstick and, ah, too much rouge
Gets me excited, leaves me feeling confused
And I like my women just a little on the trashy side.
Yeah, I like my women and I like 'em on the trashy side!
Songwriters: Chris Wall / Jerry Jeff Walker
Trashy Women lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc
I LIKE MY WOMEN A LITTLE ON THE TRASHY SIDE....
Cold wine - shocking!
Soo-meli-errrr...
This here red wine is cold!
Best said in a high falutein’ “I’m special” voice along with a French accent. Imagine that you’re Pepe’ Le Pew...
May this be the very worst of it! ;)
And I love the ground crew idea too - have they even got those hi-viz paddles? Could catch on!
Friday is cocktails before dinner night. My sweet nephew was on site, had cocktails with the folks. Report is they didn’t like the red wine. Apparently served it cold! I will speak to the warden about that! Lots of complaints about the food at dinner also.
Dad has moved from looking for his car to looking for his airplane?! No clue as to where that is coming from......Mom and Dad are still the trouble makers in the joint. Mom told Dad to go get bread and go to the bank yesterday, so away he goes......Was gonna fly the plane I guess but ground crew thwarted take off.
We’re in a rural area and we are sorta the Barbie and Ken around here. A little younger and more able than many neighbors. So it’s pet care, get the car started, blow snow , whatever.....So I got other stuff to beat on. I’m ok.
And yes, the end result will not change no matter where I am or what I do. Got it......
But ya know, as burnt out that I am, you still have to fight back the nice memories of your childhood and the need to give your mom some comfort some how.
But I’m adjusting . And can’t wait to hear about cocktail night! I’ll let you know........
windy - as ff said, your mum was having the equivalent of a tantrum. The changes kinda blow your mind, don't they? I sure understand the anger at them refusing to take sensible steps along the way, and also the fear that you are not doing enough. But you are doing enough, and, as has been said often here, seniors (and others) have the right to make bad decisions for themselves, not that we have to like it. Why not give it a break for a while, and find something else to concentrate on. You have conquered the snow on the roof. Is there anything else that needs doing around your house? Something you can punch or whack? I remember in the old days, beating carpets to clean them. It was quite satisfying.
The other thing I'll say is that it took me a long time to learn that I don't control the universe. There comes a point where you can't change the inevitable outcome of your parents' condition. And where whether you're there or not will not change the end result. So relax and let the professionals do their job (sounds like they're doing very well) and you continue being the concerned adult child. You're doing a wonderful job as well - being caring and informed. And report back on whether mom partook of the cocktails. :)
FF, I was just half kidding about Hospice. Just half though....It did sound pretty grim for a minute there. But this staff is great at keeping me updated from 3 states away.
It all reminds me of a great cartoon in the book by Roz Chast, CAN WE TALK ABOUT SOMETING MORE PLEASANT. Her poor mom is near death one day and the next day she’s up, had her hair done and eaten a steak dinner.
My Mom was a climber and tumbler so it felt like every other day I was getting a call from long-term-care about her adventures trying to escape her bed thus falling half way out, or leaning over in her wheelchair to pick up some non-existed items off the floor and rolling out... [sigh]
And there were times I felt my Dad saw more of the carpet fibers then TV. Dad would forget to use his walker when it was a bathroom run. The bathroom in his senior apartment was just too tiny to move a walker around easily. Makes me wonder what was the architect thinking when he/she designed the rooms :P
You say cocktail hour is tomorrow. Wonder if the red wine is actually cranberry juice mixed with wine? That's one way to get older folks to take the much needed cranberry juice :)
By evening, was eating a little and went to bingo?!! My mom..Bingo!?
Tomorrow is cocktail hour before dinner. Can’t wait to find out if mom and dad will be partying down like rock stars......