Tributes to Loved Ones

A beautiful post salutem.

My grandmother died some 34 yrs. ago. I still remember her smile, her laughter, her passion for the simple things in life: she would take me for walks along the bay in summer, teach me to play Italian card games, and she would teach me a host of Italian expressions about human nature, all of which were true. She taught me to bake, and to sew. She taught me about grief, and how to endure it: how to visit it in small doses, and then put it back up on the shelf, and how to remain ever loyal and mindful of those who had passed on by talking about them and praying for them. She taught me the most important word in the Latin language: Salutem--salvation, She used to read a children's story to me: "and when you look up into the sky tonight it will be in one of the stars that I shall be living, and it will be in one of the stars that I shall be laughing, and there is beauty in the laughter of the stars, and sweetness in the memories of those you love." I know she is living and laughing in one of the stars I am looking at this evening---till we meet again. God willing

Cheers to your Father Send!

For he's a jolly good fellow that nobody can deny!

Hip Hip Hooray!

On April 8, 1949, a 3 y.o. fell down an abandoned well in San Marino. The resulting rescue attempt gripped Southern California. Television stations KTLA and KTTV broadcast live.
There were many volunteers that tried to rescue her.
On April 10th, a volunteer went down a rescue shaft 88-98 ft. to further rescue efforts.
That was my father.

MOTHERS DAY is May 12, 2019 in the USA.

After 30 years since my Mom passed, I don't think I could ever forget her.
Not on Mother's Day, not on her birthday, and not on the anniversary date
of her death.

I’ll raise a tribute to my mother who passed away 6 yrs ago yesterday. She was 89.
She wasn’t perfect but I grew up with lots of love and family ( hers, as she was one of 11). My dad passed away when she was 41 (he 43) & I never heard her complain about money being tight or anything we had minimal materialistic stuff but we thought anything new was the “cat’s meow” so we appreciated it.
Yes God Bless you Mom, up there with the rest of the family.
Yes it was terrible the last 3 or so years before she passed. That’s how I know about the lengthy journey to inevitable placement to a NH.
She lived with my brother thank goodness & they were good together UNTIL the *event* that precipitated her decline (broken hip). Then it took about 3 years of back and forth to hospitals still trying to keep her home, stove fires (she left grease on), trips outside in the middle of the night to feed the animals as you could never throw away any food, plenty of middle of the night calls to me because she was enraged about something, belligerent with my brother, etc etc etc.
I loved my mother but knew it was her time to go. It was hard of course. Hard to get through.
I can’t even remember the exact date she passed as I was there 36 hrs.
But when it was over, it was more of a relief. I knew what she wanted and she *almost* got it - to stay at her home and no NH placement, but it just wasn’t feasible (see above for examples). Yeah I feel a little guilty about that but am over it. We can’t control everything.

So here’s to you, mom!

One in a million, she was..

I miss my parents terribly. I miss their smiles. Their voices. Mom’s warm hugs. Dad’s clever wit.

The way Mom would bring Dad dinner in bed and take off his shoes after he fell asleep.

The way Dad loved to make friends out of strangers and attentively and eagerly listen to their stories.

I wish I could tell them they were right about everything. Because they were.

The little things—
The fragrance of Mom’s favorite face cream. Listening to talk radio in Dad’s car. The smooth way he drove.

I would give anything to hold their hand one more time and to share one more conversation. To look into their sparkling eyes or listen to their words. To just have the chance to physically tell them that they still mean the world to me. To tell them I’m okay. To make sure they are okay.

When they were alive I never could imagine life without them. Sometimes now I pretend to myself they are still alive to ease the pain of their loss. It all went too fast. How can I go on, knowing that I can’t ever talk to them again in my lifetime?

I try not to say, “Mom would do this,” and “Dad would say that” all day long, for fear that I am boring those around me, but I’m endlessly saying those things quietly in my own head.

I loved taking care of them in their final years. Although physically and emotionally exhausting and sometimes very sad, what a privilege it was to give back to the people who gave me life! I would do it all, a thousand times again. I’d even live through the terribly hard times, if I could relish a couple of the happy moments again.

Caretakers become so so closely connected to their loved ones. When they had a bad day, I was deflated. When they rallied, I was overjoyed. If your loved ones live long enough, you together share absolute miracles of survival. We were a team, working hard so they could stay alive, healthy and happy. Without them, I feel sometimes directionless and empty.

Giving a tribute to my loved one while he is still alive.
When I call him, I say "this is me (my name)".
He says: "I know it is you", said so sweetly.

He knows that because I am the only one (up in age) who still respects their elders, and calls him "Uncle (then his name".

Thanks Countrymouse :-)- "mehr Licht!" how profound

Gershun,

How long has it been since your mom died?

What beautiful things are being said and thought about their loved ones. Boy it makes me smile. Im not quite ready to talk about my mom just yet, im still missing her so much. She died this past september and its been a struggle taking care of my dad now. He doesnt want to be here. He wants to be with her. So many years together he doesnt want to be here without her. So hard i guess. We all just miss her so much it hurts to even say her name sometimes. Take care everyone and thank you for the smile today.

Nice thread, thanks to everyone. So sweet to read.

I miss too many to list! Dad and mother in law top the list.

I called my dad, ‘daddy’ until the day he died. He was a simple man. He grew up poor, very poor. In fact, he had to quit school in the fourth grade to work and help support his family.

He was drafted into WW11, met my mom, married, 4 kids, raised 2 cousins when aunt and uncle died. Went back to school as an adult to get a degree. Very proud oh him.

I was the only girl. He told me that no boy would honk their car in the driveway for his little girl to go running out to their car. He expected a date to go inside, shake his hand, first name and last name, father’s name and place of work or I could not go out on a date! He loved me.

He died in 2002 at 85.

She died 25 years ago. She was only 68.

My mother in law law told me that I was the daughter she never had. Melted my heart. She raised a beautiful son. I thanked her often for being such a wonderful mother to him because he became a wonderful husband to me.

Pretty classy choice of poem for her final thoughts, Micky :) - that's just lovely.

Goethe's own recorded last words were "mehr Licht!" I think he shed plenty in his lifetime, don't you?

Today is 6 months since my dad died.   He sends me signs so I know he is happily in heaven watching over me.  I still can't believe he's gone.  I wish I could just sit and talk with him for 5 more minutes. 

The days before  my dad passed away, I was listening to this song over and over and I said to myself "Daddy... play this for me so I know you are ok".
When I got the call from my sister at the NH that my dad passed away, I got in my car right away and the very first song that came on the radio was "Knocking on Heavens Door".  That was the song I was playing over and over.  Every time I hear it now it makes me feel closer to him.

I miss him so much.

My Mother died a year ago today and constantly uttered the word "gefunden" for the last few hours of her life - she was of German origin and I later found out this was a poem by the German writer Johann Wolfgang (von) Goethe - this poem was used as a lesson in school to learn about famous writers - whether this was a direct nod to the poem or just "discovered / found (the literal translation of the word - I will never know - but here it is translated into English.....

Gefunden
I walked the woodland,
A lonesome man.
To look for nothing-
That was my plan.

I saw a flower
Deep in the plants:
It gleamed like starlight,
Glowed like a glance.

I reached to pluck it
When its dear lilt
Said: Would you snap me
To see me wilt?

So up I dug it
With roots and all
And brought it home to
The garden wall.

Once more I lay it
Half in the shade
To see it blossom
And never fade!


Love to you all !!

Lovely poem, Gershun.
Losing my mother was the worst for me. She was 89 & her body was failing.

When my mother passed away it was 3am. I remember leaving the NH and seeing a beatiful full moon. Now every full moon is knicknamed “Mommy’s Moon”.

Also, Blue Jays. I don’t quite know why but my brother put this idea in my head, but now when there is a Blue Jay in my yard I think of my mother.

These are only two special quirky things and there are several more. It’s funny how our minds work.

Hi everyone I lost my mother at the end of 2018 for which I took care of her 4 1\2 yrs I can't get over her being gone it hurts so much and father died ten yrs ago and my eldest sister died also ten yrs ago. I feel so alone inside that everybody left and I was the youngest child. I don't know how will i get through this.It happen so fast when she past that she didn't even know what happened to her.And I know she still wanted to be here on this earth for at least a year or two.I told her I loved her and please wait for me when it's my time .But she couldn't talk but I think she heard me. I miss her so.....I love you momma.

As was your poem Gershun, very touching and beautiful.
It's hard I know.

A beautiful tribute Smeshque.

Thank you Gershun for this thread,
I have 2 special loved ones I miss dearly.
My Dad and my oldest brother.
My Dad is who I am like most in this world. He was a very serious man, however he could tell a joke. He liked to make people laugh. So, following his lead,everyday, I tell my Mom at least 2 jokes to make her laugh. My Dad was Native American, and he was a great provider for his family. He was one of the greatest hunters around, you could ask anyone that knew him. He loved my Mom so very much, and he loved me I know. Every night in the last two years of his life living here, we(Dad, Mom, DH, me)would play rook after reading scripture and praying together. When he was ready to turn in, he would say, I am heading south, (because their bedroom is on the southside of the house), and I would give him a hug and kiss and tell him goodnight I love you, and he back. He loved card games and he was the best checker player ever. I played many a double solitaire games with him. And helped him cut wood up until the day of his passing. Even when his body was giving out on him, he still did what he could to provide something for his family. Before his passing he made sure my Mom would be taken care of, and his gift to her was travel. He didn't like to travel, and it hurt his body in later years to travel, so he left her provision for travel. Which is why I try and take my Mom traveling as often as possible, that was his gift to her. I could go on and on about the man I miss. But, I will say the greatest gift he left me, was his love for the Lord, instilling that in me. I will always miss my Dad, tearing up now, But I know I will see him again. I love him so much.
My oldest brother was a special guy. Do to the misuse of forceps at his birth, he had cerebral palsy. This kept him with the mind of about a 4-6 year old. He was not supposed to live past 6, but the Lord kept him alive until he was 45. My Mom cared for him 24/7. He could not walk and was wheelchair bound. But he had super upper body strength. He won wheelchair races in the special Olympics. He did not see himself as different and anyone who met him instantly fell in love with him. He was the most loving and forgiving person. Oh and his smile and laugh would just cheer you up. He loved writing,going to church, santa claus(Ho Ho as he called him), jc penney christmas catalogs and hot wheel cars and pens. He always had to have a shirt with a pocket to carry his pens.When I was little I would play cars with him, and sometimes he would write all over my school books., but i should have kept them up. He was 18 years older than I. he loved trains and we would drive to the tracks so he could watch them go by. He collected money and would count it every night. He was the sunshine in our family and he was the teacher of compassion. The Lord said unless ye become like these little one,,,,, Well he was ll that. The essence of beauty and love and all that love means. He has been gone for about 17 years now. But I think of him everyday, and when I think of him I am sure to smile. I will always love that guy, and he couldn't say my name so he called me Baby, being that I was the baby of the family, very logical I thought. I could go on and on about him as well. I know I will see him again, and I know my Mom misses the both of them way more than I do.
Thank you for letting me remember loves of my life,
I gotta get some tissue now.
Sorry so long

Mom,

You were the world to me
I miss you everyday
If I could have just one more day with you................
It would not be enough
But I would take it anyway

Your smile could thaw an iceberg
Your touch was warm and kind
You put your heart into everything
You are always on my mind

One day I hope to see you again
Till then you are in my heart
My dearest Mother and friend