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Roseformom: I see that the trip between your mother and brother went well per your post further down this thread,
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I think you're handling things very well. I think I get caring what your brother thinks even though he does or doesn't do things that make you angry as regards your mother. You don't say anything about hating your brother or how terribles a person he is, etc. You may have grown up loving your brother, and perhaps you still love him now, despite his behaviors. It's pretty normal to care what someone thinks when you have cared for that person (i.e., your brother) for many years of your life. At the same time, as others have said, you have every reason to believe that you are doing the right things for your mom, and that your brother usually does not show much understanding.
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