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Lololewis, I understand your need to be with your mother, but I do wonder if you will be able to provide quality care for her at home. That you ask what you will need makes me wonder more. Taking care of someone with late-stage Alz who can neither walk nor communicate requires much physical strength and a support team, along with the equipment and knowledge for handling things that come up. Is your mother receiving quality care where she is? If she is, it may be that bringing her home might not be the best option for her. If you want to bring her home, you might want to ask an expert to come to your home and recommend what you need to accommodate the needs of your mother. If you decide that the best option is to visit your mother often in the nursing home is the best option, people here will understand. If you decide to bring her home, this is a great place to talk to people about what you are going through.
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You need a good talk with a therapist before you embark on this caregiving role. Taking on a 24/7 responsibility alone is impossible without support services. Good Luck!
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Have you really thought this through? One person cannot handle a 24hr caregiving for someone who is bedridden and cannot talk. Who will be doing the night shift? When you have to go for grocery, etc...do you have someone to stay and care for her? Or will there be others? How much will you be paying them? Caring for a "dementia" person is 24hrs a day, 7 days a week, every day. After 2 years, you will need a vacation. Who will stay while you go? Or will you not go because you cannot find anyone reliable and trustworthy? Or because mom is in such a fragile state that you will postpone any trips?

But, the most important question I have for you: WHY do you want to bring home your mother who cannot walk or talk? Why?

If you can honestly answer this question, and TRULY believe that bringing her home will mean that you will really take good care for her, sigh...I hope you do succeed.

I will be commenting based on father and my experiences with mom....You will need to get a hospital bed, a triangle trapeze, air mattresses, waterproof bed vinyl bedcover, waterproof bed pads, lessons on how to lift her properly up on the bed, to turn to the side of the bed and then transfer to the wheelchair. Same applies on getting her back on the bed. You will need to learn how to shower/bathe her in the bathroom or on the hospital bed. (Thank goodness the govt caregivers approved us because in the 13 yrs mom was bedridden, I only did one sponge bathe that was soooo lacking in finnesse.) For the wheelchair, a wedge pillow to help prevent her from sliding down where her butt is halfway off the wheelchair. Maybe one or two seatbelts when needed.

Sorry, I don't know anything about lifts from the bed to chair. However, I have read of a Hoyer Lift. There are some new gadgets that I've read here.

I took care of my 2 bedridden parents. Yes, I had a full time job. But, my sister who stays with us does NOT help me with changing of their pampers or cleaning mom's trache or cleaning her oxygen canisters. I've been helping father caregive
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Sorry but I have to say this:::???? I hope you have thought about this decision long and hard...You will be giving up your life and any and "all free time" to caring for your Mom..

Just remember:“If you can quit, quit. If you can't quit, stop complaining - this is what you chose.”
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