Follow
Share
Read More
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
1 2 3 4 5
Glad you're ok.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Ditto on all the comments - we've all been wondering and I've been praying that you're o.k. So glad to hear from you, Mimsey, and I know from all the posts that it is good news for all. Only share here what you feel like you want to. We don't need details, just what you are comfortable with. Hugs/ oooxxx
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

WHEW ! ! ! ! ! MIMSEY IS ALL RIGHT ! ! ! ! !
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

MIMSEY, So glad to hear form you. I've kept checking in thinking about you and hoping you are doing well. As folks here have said, we can't run away and were living through you! Until you return to fill us in, godspeed in your journey. Jessica
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Yay, Mimsey! I just cried a little, too. I'm so glad you are doing better now!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

When you get a chance, if you feel like it, let us know what (and how) you are doing. As you can see, many people on this site have been thinking about you and wishing you well. We want what is best for you and will support whatever decisions you have made. Just try not to feel guilty about whatever it is that you have decided to do - you have already done so much more than anyone has a right to expect of another person.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

When you get a chance, if you feel like it, let us know what (and how) you are doing. As you can see, many people on this site have been thinking about you and wishing you well. We want what is best for you and will support whatever decisions you have made. Just try not to feel guilty about whatever it is that you have decided to do - you have already done so much more than anyone has a right to expect of another person.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Thanks for checking in Mimsey!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Mimsey......thank God you're alright.......thanku for posting......As you can see.....you have many,many people that care n love you n are very worried about your safety....Please post again, soon, n let us know now things are going....I'm soooo grateful I was online when your post popped up....I feel much better now......much love, sweet friend.....Beck
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Oh-oh-oh-oh! You ALL back me up! I can hardly believe it. I've felt so guilty. I've been reading through all these and crying and crying. I haven't been online in awhile except for a little bit of email. I have to go now, but I am much better. I'll tell all of you what has been going on as soon as I can get back online. Thank you all so very very much. You are wonderful!
Helpful Answer (15)
Report

We can fantasize about Mimsey escaping as many of us would like to do - sometimes it's nice to live vicariously (if that is your only option). That may or may not be what happened but it's nice to imagine that she is "free" so why not let ourselves believe that.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

I think she came here, found that we agreed that her action was the right thing to do and, being satisfied, and wanting no longer to even think about the situation she left (good riddance), she has gone on her way. She's now free from the concern about all the stuff we put up with. I might just react that way myself. During the time my mom is in rehab, I didn't want to have to give any more time to worrying about her; she is in good hands 24 hours and day and why drive myself nuts some more with the 24 hour concerns I was carrying? Let it go and enjoy the time! And that's what I'm doing.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Agree with Jinx4740 - Mimsey expressed and acted on something many of us have had. Maybe she's too busy taking care of herself to come back to the forum.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I'm so proud of this community for responding with such compassion! Mimsey did what she had to do. You all understand. Stay strong, Mimsey, set boundaries, work on your own health and your other relationships will find their proper order.
Take care of yourselves - all of you. You're the best!
Carol
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

If she has followed the answers to her post she may have been frightened off by the mentions of people trying to find her. She probably thought she was being anonymous with her post and was wary of being traced.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Good point, Pekilove. She might've gone back for whatever reason and she doesn't want to "disappoint" us all. If you're reading this, Mimsey, some/most/all(?) of us do understand that sometimes what we want to do and what we can actually do are two different things. We only know a little bit of your story and I, for one, am in no position to judge. Just know we've been thinking about you and if you get the chance to pop in just to say 'I'm okay', please do. :)
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

Ditto that Jinx and Balexander! But we may also have put her in an awkward situation as for whatever the reason she may have returned to her home, MIL and Husband. And she never said she was physically abused, mentally and emotionally yes. As a past victim of domestic abuse..the physical kind, I know I returned to that situation a few times before I could no longer take it. If she has returned she may be embarrased to post. As with all that post here, we can only be supportive and keep those of us here in our thoughts and prayers.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

LOL, Jinx4740, that was a mouth full! Fantasy! Go Mimsey, go!
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Of course - many of us are not in a position to walk out - I am not since there really isn't anyone else to take care of my husband. But if we are honest, there are many times that we would all like to do what she did.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

A lot of people post here one time and never return. I assume that Mimsey is one of them.

It's interesting how, with no further encouragement from Mimsey, we all JUMPED at the chance to tell a caregiver to get out and not come back. Do you think we might be living out our fantasies through her?
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

I don't know if there is any way to do something without opening a can of worms. We are all concerned about her welfare, and one person is concerned about privacy issues as well. I feel quite conflicted over this. On the one hand, I feel like I should try to do something. On the other hand, we are all adults and responsible for our own welfare, and this is a site to vent and share, and seek guidance from others. So far, I have done nothing except offer my suggestions and ask that Mimsey give us an update as soon as she is able. Maybe a week is not enough to arrange reliable security for herself, or maybe she went to a women's shelter where her privacy is very closely guarded (hence no communication lines). Who knows? I want to trust that she trusts her instincts to protect herself and won't go back to the source of her troubles. I'll just keep praying for her and hope for the best.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I have written Mimsey personally as well as in this thread. No responses at all ! !
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I came back to this question because I really wanted to know how Mimsey was doing and hoped that she had posted an update.

While we can all tell you BRAVO Mimsey for walking away, you have to live your life in whatever way you choose. Please just know that we are thinking about you and praying for you and the other members of your family!

God Bless You All!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

you snapped and ran away......now you enjoy your freedom.......take a deep breath and enjoy yourself.......live it up......do all the things you couldn't do when you were tied down......you got away from the servitude of caregiving......ENJOY!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Let your husband do it and let us know when he packs his things and runs away too? You did the right thing. I would only take care of my own two parents , nobody else's EVER! After all they My in-laws ) & ( lol , I'm on my third set and have never even met these ones thank G-d) did not take care of me when I was a child . She has her son , your husbands Mother ( and no longer his wife ). My Husband has been wonderful with both my parents though , but they have been more parents to him for the past 20 years than his own ( he has not seen his own in 30 years). My Daddy was a Doctor himself so is my hubby. On August 20 , 2013 it will be 1 year since we lost my beloved Daddy. My Mummy is in a group home and my Hubby goes to see her more and takes her out for dinner at the club more than I do. So I guess sometimes the third time is the Charm ( well it has been for both of us ) It will be 19 or 20 years on July 30 , 2013 . Last year my daddy was so ill we forgot all about it. this year we will make up for it , big time! Hugs to You and I stand in Awe of how BRAVE you are . Do Not go Back , until something changes and not just words! Talk's Cheap!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Mimsey,

Dear heart,
THANK YOU for rescuing yourself!

You set perfectly reasonable, firm limits on other's use of your time, resources & self.
Of course, others will not understand--at first...may get mad, may act out, etc...
...they want you to go back to the same-old-same-old destructive spot you had been in, to take yet more mistreatment.
It IS mistreatment, when those around you, who could help, don't.

STICK to your good, reasonable limits--
--otherwise, others will understand immediately, that you never really meant it about needing help, a break, relief, anything...and it kicks the door open for yet more abuse of you by others.
STICK TO YOUR LIMITS!

Frankly, even spouses who may otherwise seem sweet and wonderful, may not be so, as when under pressure in scenes like yours, they show themselves.
IF they will treat you like this under these circumstances, what will they treat you like when you need help and advocacy?

It seems caregiving elders at home, can often cause unstable partnerships to finally break.
OTH, it may help those who've been struggling with things over time, to become stronger, as we work through our issues more productively, prodded by the issues of caregiving stressors.

Please take care of YOU!
If you need it, get some good counseling, so you can learn better coping skills.
You can poke around online for many things that help...someone on this site posted about narcissistic mothers--it could be very helpful--could be someone else is narcissistic-- or not, if that's not what's going on.

{{hugs!}}
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I, too, am concerned for not hearing from Mimsey for a week. I've been checking to see if she has posted. Her safety is of utmost concern and that would be a reason to report a post. It is our business as supporters on this site to care and a week with no post from her is worrisome. Mimsey, if you're out there, please let us know that you're o.k. We don't have to have specifics, but just to know you are O.K. We truly do care, that is what this site is all about and if you've been reading, there are many, many who do care. xxxooo with Love, Blessings and Prayers for you to be safe and cared for in your own right.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Well .. the good news is that getting an IP address ain't gonna give a phone number or address (or I'd *never* use the internet). Her privacy is secure. And what's to report, anyway? She left her husband. HE's the one responsible for his own mother.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I have no advice except you have to fill your cup up before you can fill any one else's, and yours is empty. Rst and gather yourself back to health and then see how your husband has done with HIS part of helping. You are an absolute saint for what you have done, since I SO understand, I have been caring for my MIL for nearly 10 years as well as my Brother in Law. NO other family support (have 5 kids) not one of them will lift a finger. So it fell on my shoulders solely. I feel your hurt, but I know there is not much you can do but take care of YOU, sinc edit hit YOU there is no help for anyone. Sending you gentle hugs and prayers of peace and healing for you.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

you people......it's none of your business.....what she does........going as far as telling
the site administrator......so they can get her IP address.......what country do you
think this is russia........some of your people amaze me in the worst possible way!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

1 2 3 4 5
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter