Follow
Share

Watching a loved one's rapid decline is the most difficult thing I've ever experienced in my life. I've never lost anyone this close to me. The last two months have been filled with worry, sadness, lack of appetite, and inconsistent sleep.


Dad is in hospice now (just accepted this week on Tuesday). I spoke to the doctor today and I mentioned that my father hasn't had any food or fluids for the past week. I told him that I knew he cannot tell me exactly how long he has left but I wanted to know with the lack of any intake what was his estimate. He told me he didn't expect him to make it through this weekend and he apologized.


I can't say I'm surprised. I really didn't see my dad making it to the end of the month at this rate. I barely slept last night. I don't know how to get through the anxiety of waiting for the "final call."

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
It is never easy for anyone to watch a LO dying, and I extend my sympathy to you during this difficult time. Death has a sting that no one can fathom. Try your best to find comfort in knowing that your father is in hospice care where his needs and comfort level will be taken care of. Also, try your best to prepare yourself for the moment when he will transition into the great beyond by speaking to a grief counselor or a preacher if you are religious. To get through this difficult time, try to focus on the happier times you have had with your dad and try not to dwell on the sadness that’s present now. This is a journey that everyone has to go through, and you need to stay strong to face the inevitable. When your father’s journey is over, please be reassured that he is no longer in pain or discomfort.

Hoping that you will find comfort and peace during this difficult moment.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I missed the end with one parent and was right there for other. I came away convinced that the final hours are a solo journey and my presence didn’t matter a lot either way. I’m sorry you’re in the place of anticipating this and hope you’ll do whatever feels right to you as the end comes. Your dad will know your love and care no matter what. I wish you the comfort of good memories and peace through it all
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

May God bless you and give you the strength you need to accept the upcoming loss of your dear father. Its very difficult to witness the dying process, I know. I witnessed it with both of my parents and left their presence before they took their final breath because I did NOT want that moment to be my final memory of them. I was sad but relieved when the end did come because they were finally relieved of their earthly suffering and whole once more with God. I've had many signs from dad that he's fine and happy on the Other Side. Try to take solace in realizing dad's suffering is coming to an end soon, as hard as it is to watch.

Wishing you peace within your heart and faith that life is eternal.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Wishing you peace as you go through this difficult time. It’s the hardest part. I am so sorry. I wish that I could say something to make you feel better but there aren’t any words that will truly help in these situations.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I myself, with my brother at this place, simply said my own kind of "prayer" to the universe, to whatever powers may be (at 81 I remain an atheist, so with little hope of answers) to ease my brother's passing, to keep him below any level of pain of awareness. As an RN I often saw people very near the end believe their loved ones who died before them were there for them. So I asked that the love of his life, a man much younger than him who died so early in life, would come to accompany his journey. I think all facing this are comforted by "ritual", by a wish to believe "something" and as I have often loved the sheer poetic beauty of the psalms I comforted myself with the musicality of their cadences.
In short, whatever comfort you can find, guardian for his journey, and peace for yourself, do avail yourself.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report
NeedHelpWithMom Mar 15, 2024
I’m reading how you ‘pray’, Alva and I wonder how many people pray this way.

I have often prayed the same way as you, because I hate the idea of viewing God as a slot machine, Santa Claus or a genie who will grant all of my wishes.

I know that believers are supposed to pray for what we desire but also include “Thy will be done.” in the prayer, which is very hard to do in these situations.

Some prayers are answered the way we want and others aren’t. We never know what will happen. I do feel like prayer helps, no matter if it’s to the universe, God or both.
(1)
Report
See 1 more reply
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter