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I just roll with it and try to make it low stress.
This year, I am going to try to not secretly unwrap and then re wrap presents with my name on them. I am tired of acting surprised when I open them in front of everyone.
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Isthisrealyreal Oct 2021
This made me think of my 5 year old nephew.

Every gift he opened was "exactly what he wanted" from socks, underwear, to wrestling buddies. This was several decades ago and his perfect appreciation of every single gift made that a special, memorable Christmas for everyone there.

His exact words, "Wow, that's exactly what I wanted, Thank you!"

He only lived 21 years and he left more happy memories for his family than any other person I have ever known.

So give that big surprised thank you, even if you sneaked a peak.
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As my dad has a progressive illness the reality of having a perfect Xmas will be non existent. This Xmas we will be having carers 4 X a day during the day. I'm not sure how my dad will be on that . As long as we have a Xmas tree, Xmas crackers, a nice cooked meal fitted in between carers & to watch my dad open a present will be all that we need. It's usually just me, dad , my partner & daughter anyway. My sister never involved herself in Xmas anyway. Hope you all have a happy Xmas.
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Suggestions for an easy ‘traditional’ Christmas:

1) Plan a small manageable Christmas dinner, no more than 4 or 5 people including you. The person you are caring for can’t cope with a bigger crowd, can’t hear the conversations, gets very tired. That’s probably true as well as a good excuse. Others can schedule a visit on Christmas eve or Boxing Day, or a phone call instead.
2)Work out food that’s easy, and dole out responsibility for particular things if you want to. ‘Gourmet’ icecream for desert, or microwave pudding works well. Doing this for my almost-end-of-life BIL, we did lots of little finger food savories that were small (so he could try a bite of several) and that didn’t need him to manage cutlery. Slice of ham wrapped around a stick of cucumber or asparagus, a little bit of turkey on a tiny biscuit with a dob of sauce on top, peeled prawns on a cocktail stick, that sort of thing. Easy to get ready in advance, easy to clean up, and everyone enjoyed it.
3)Forget the presents, or make a rule that they must cost less than $10. If anyone really wants to splurge, they do it separately so there are no comparisons.
4)Buy a very small artificial tree, and decorate it with just a few ‘family’ ornaments. No big tree to topple over, no buckets of water to carry, and nice memories that come up with the ornaments. I have a lovely little nativity set that comes out every year, good to prompt someone to sing a carol or two. You don't need much to make it special.

It’s a bit miserable to ignore Christmas (shades of post marriage breakup), but there’s no need to make it over-the-top. Love to all, Margaret
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Hello everyone!
Thanksgiving update. Last Sunday the hubs and I went to my parents ALF for Thanksgiving lunch. It was a warm lovely day with a light breeze we sat outside. Turkey and ham with all the fixings. Nice party music in the background.
My parents will come over for Thanksgiving lunch. Enchiladas on Friday!
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Christmas update:
Christmas Eve Dinner: Steak, baked potatoes, fresh green salad with ranch dressing, Chocolate Satin Pie. I bought a pie because I was stressed.

Christmas Day: Christmas breakfast of eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast.
Finger sandwiches at parents ALF. Fresh fruit and cheese platter.

Thank you for starting this discussion Beatty. I used it focus and stay on track and not give into people pleasing.
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Thanksgiving Update.
I didn't have Turkey this year. I'm not a big fan.
My wife bought a Costco chicken,small ham, McCormak instant gravy, scalloped potatoes and a vegetable. My son and wife brought dessert, which came from Costco as well.
Everything came from Costco.
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Christmas Update.
I just couldn't resist the urge to secretly unwrap and then re-wrap presents with my name on them.
My 94.5 year old mother came out of her room and caught me. She can be stealthy with her walker. First time in 63 years.
Maybe I'll have better willpower next year....
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Llamalover47 Jan 2022
ThomasY: How great that your 94 and 1/2 year old mother is that agile with her walker!
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Beatty, it was never my very favorite time. I feel it puts such a burden on people to make nice! They are already beating themselves up here for slamming a door. I love the cards, the lights. As an atheist I don't much do the birthday. But I refuse to do the gifts now in a family where the children are all grown up. If others do it that's fine and I can enjoy sitting and watching. I am one of those folks who has to comb it all out to the last split end, so that when we get all this much needed California rain I sit worrying about our homeless in their swamped tents. I can play that out to every other country in the middle of a civil war, a famine. My mind just "goes there" in these holidays. I love getting back to real life.
For those who love the holidays I wish them the very merriest cheer of the day, or the most peaceful and joyful of celebrations of the birth of their Christ. For me I am down to I have 365 days, should I live so long, before the next round. My present is seeing those like you who give so much joy and great advice here the live long year.
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ThomasY, busted! Hahahaha!
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bundleofjoy Dec 2021
busted by 94.5 year-old mom. haha :).
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Just spoke with one of my siblings. He’s going out for tacos and beer tonight with a group of men that have met up every December 26 for the last eight years to have a quiet celebration that it’s all over for another 364 days🤗
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Well farewell December & farewell 2021 (another F word springs to mind actually..)

Welcome Janualry 2022.
I will be pleased to see you - despite the uncertainty, new challenges & the coming heat

Must roll on.
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Beatty, I can think of an F word, an S word, probably lots of words to describe the year that was.
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There are NO words!
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“Hoping for the best, prepared for the worst, and unsurprised by anything in between.”
― Maya Angelou, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings

Says it well for me.

Happy New Year's Eve everyone!
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