Follow
Share
Read More
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
What isn't mentioned here is what Mom's personality type has always been. Has she always been somewhat manipulative and demanding, histrionic or ordinarily suspicious/skeptical, and what you're seeing is really an exacerbation of old traits? Or has she been a kind, considerate person in her lifetime, and this is a real personality change? Answering 'yes' to either or both of these, but especially to the latter, indicates a cognitive impairment or early dementia, in which case a geriatric psychiatrist (or even Mom's PCP, if they are comfortable with their level of proficiency in the area) could determine that your Mom lacks capacity, thus a court hearing to determine competence could ensue. This is, however, expensive. And if Mom 'presents well,' it may very well not go in your favor, giving Mom more ammunition to use against the family. Have you or the tearful nurse contacted Elder
Services to report your Dad as an 'elder at risk?' Elder Services may be able to take some of the burden off you and your family. Best wishes on this difficult dilemma.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

The above answer is a good one. If that doesn't work, a through physical checkup by a geriatric doctor to determine if your mom is competent is needed. Than a court hearing would probably be needed to judge your mom mentally and/or physically incompetent. If there is plenty of money, is it possible to move your dad to another place in the facility and give him a spending allowance. Your mom could be in the stages of dementia, it sounds like, or maybe she's always been that way. Your facility should have a social worker available to discuss options with you. Also if you don't like the attorney, you can switch to another, or in the case of dementia have a competency hearing for your mother, she might not be able to make reasonable decisions and it might come to an issue of you dad's safety in keeping them together. If they were in a position to see each other often in a setting where there are other people around, but the 24/7 control issue is dealt with your mom, it might settle things down.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

The skilled nursing facility might end up drugging your mom if your mom becomes difficult for them. Why ever would you want to do that? Your mom might need some psychological therapy. Perhaps you folks might want to schedule a therapist to come to their apt. to see her. Also the only person who can force your mom into a facility is the person who has the POA/health care directive over your mom. Would that be the attorney? if so, then you need to talk to the attorney about your mom's situation. If you don't want the attorney in charge of your mom's health, then ask your mom to switch the POA to both of you.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter