My 92 year old mother-in-law is now in an assisted living facility. She has been having trouble adjusting to being left alone in her room from time to time. She has obsessed about her cat for several years now...constantly wanting to know where the cat is, wants it brought to her, wants to sleep with it, calls it to come to her all the time...which it doesn't do because it's a cat...wants to hold it all the time, etc. Now she is clutching the poor cat so hard that she is being scratched and the sons are considering moving her to the memory care unit where she is not allowed any pets. We are looking for suggestions on how to ease her into not having her cat with her. What can we tell her so that she will not go to pieces? I understand that something comforting can be said...such as she is sleeping at the other house and you will see her later and then quickly redirect the conversation and/or get up and move...head for ice cream or something. But I'm sure with her dementia she will be asking for the cat over and over again.
Has anyone else had to deal with this and what worked best for you?
Thank you so much.
Kathy
This isn't very kum-ba-ya but can you fib and tell her that one of the grandkids wants a cat for Christmas and that's where kitty went. Take a photo of kitty with a bow or Santa hat (LOL) and frame it for her. So every day kitty is there. Then you or your bros take kitty. And give her a new "realistic" stuffed kitty. A
At my mom's NH there are a couple of ladies who have realistic baby dolls they have with them all the time (these are kinda spooky) and others who have stuffed dogs - they keep them calm and something to focus on. Apparently this is very common as the nursing staff rolls with it. Good Luck!
If you can't find a boneless cat, then, there's certain dog breeds that'll take just about anything. If that weren't true, there'd be a lot of dead kids in this world. I have a Lacy Cur and although not crazy about kids, she is devoted to my parents. The Lacy Cur was bred to be a ranch hand and Ruby "herds" both of my parents when we're here. She patrols the house and lets me know if either needs help when I'm in the other room.