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Deepest condolences on your loss.

My experience with grief is that there are times it is worse and times it is easier. 3 months after, 6 months and especially 9 months are hard The one year and so on. Special days are triggers - birthdays, anniversaries, holidays are tough. I see you are coming up for 9 months after and I have found that the pain is very raw at 9 months.

It is important to express your grief - tears, journaling, talking with others, finding ways to honour your grief and the one you lost. Some buy a special candle and burn it at times when grief is hard, some play meaningful music, some create a collage representing what's on their mind. Some pant a tree in memory or create a special place win their garden. Going to a grief group can help too.

Coming here and sharing with us is good as well. A little exercise - a walk for example can help when you are feeling down, a cup if your favourite coffee or tea, a hot bubble bath or some other treat can get you through those difficult times. Don't be afraid to cry. It feels bad to begin with and like you will never stop, but you will and it is healing. (((((((hugs))))))
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Coleyne: I am so sorry for your loss and send condolences. Perhaps a grief counselor could assist you short term.
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Everybody grieves differently. So there is no "right" or "wrong" way to do it. I lost my mom a little over 3 years ago and I still mourn for her loss; she died age 90 and had severe Alzheimer's. I will always love my mom, but I find solace because we all die--it is natural. Family, friends, or, if necessary, individual or group therapy can help if activities of daily living are too much to bear due to grief. Time does not get rid of the loss but it will make it hurt less due to acceptance and carrying on. Hospice should have given you information how to get in touch of grief support.
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