Husband with Parkinson’s and dementia is becoming increasingly incontinent for both urine and bowels. He takes the Depends off and goes on the floor. Or poops in the Depends and then smears poop over everything. I’m at my wits end. I need minor surgery and don't know how I’ll manage. Caregivers I’ve hired won’t deal with the poop accidents, or don’t deal with them very well. He really doesn’t qualify for long term care in a snf. Any advice?
or tear the elastic on the sides
If the accidents are hit and miss--meaning you don't have a clear clue as to when he needs to 'go' it's 100xs worse. A CG just to clean up after such a mess is really not a viable solution.
I know when my FIL began having massive blowouts anywhere he happened to be--here at our home, the coffee shop, a restaurant--it made taking him anywhere just fraught with stress. He would get 'sick' after these incidents and weak, too weak to stand in the shower so I could hose him off--and DH was so grossed out, he's just sit on the couch or wherever and dry-heave. Super helpful.
After a terrible mess made at a restaraunt that left me cleaning up for 15 minutes and him sitting in the car with DH--no towels or pads under him (BTW, it was MY car)...the wonderful restaurant staff helped me and I tipped them out close to $100....I was embarassed and furious. He would not wear depends, but rather 'thongs' which are useless.
All thongs got tossed that day and a couple of boxes of depends came into his life. Until his dr said he couldn't live alone, he was 'ok' with the depends--but such affront to his dignity. He died a few days after getting the news he would be moving to a NH.
To this DAY (17 years!) my Dh calls me selfish for not allowing his dad to live with us. It's been an issue long after it was an issue.
you just have to tear off the soiled pull up from each side and still have the protection without taking the pants off.
Does he have shorts or pants over his depends? I have seen others talk about some adaptive clothing that helps them not be able to access the depend as easily or without help. I cannot remember what the exacts were. You can look under the category incontinence here.
I change my mom in bed as she has hemiplegia and we use the depends with long tabs as I find it easier to get them off with bowel movements without creating a mess.
In home CNAs should not have a problem with cleaning bm up and having suggestions on different products or clothing to help. I’m sorry those you have worked with have not helped be part of the solution.
I also know when my mom has a uti - she does not realize what she is doing and I will have her wear a glove at night so she does not get this all under her fingernails as I know how much time it takes to clean everything up.
I wish I had more to offer but my mom is not as mobile and it doesn’t happen often - but I have seen some others post and offer ideas and I would try going to the main page and look under the incontinence subject and maybe you can find some of the older post suggestions there that I remember seeing.
You can cut or tear down the sides of depends to remove them.
I don't know what you can do if you can't afford in home help or a MC facility.
Great big warm hug! This is so difficult.