My husband’s Alzheimer’s took a turn for the worse about six weeks ago. One day he seemed OK and stable and the next hard time walking , combative and just not the same. He was able to walk, take a shower and communicate somewhat the day before. He just changed suddenly.
His doctor said to get him to the emergency immediately for tests of stroke, but there was no stroke no infections, no seizures he was released from the hospital after 4 days. I now have him in a memory care facility close to our home. He does have physical therapy come twice a week. It is a fairly nice facility, and he is cared for. The food doesn’t seem that great.
Now he seems continent but unable to do much for himself. I feel very guilty leaving him there. I am old myself, and not sure of taking him home even if I get around the clock care would be the right move. He doesn’t seem unhappy at the facility, but there is a sadness there. Has anyone taken their loved one home for a few hours during the day and brought them back to the facility at dinner time not sure that would help or confuse him. Help at 75.
It still is very hard for me to visit him every day for an hour or less and to make sure he is being cared for. It's not the best place in the world but, it's not the worst place either. He's safe and I can afford to pay for his care. They are always short staffed. I give him a shower and change his bed when I see that it won't get done. I would say to you do not take him home. I have not taken my husband to our home because it would be very sad for him because I know he wants to come home. I wish he could, but I know he can't. I do take him out for lunch once in a while and he enjoys that and sometimes for ice cream.
Sometimes I just feel like giving up, but I know I can't I have to be sure he's ok and being care for. I'm all he has to be sure he's taken care of.
You are on a very long sad journey that's heartbreaking. I'm on that same journey too. So, I do understand how you feel.
Sending lots of hugs and prayers to you.
God Bless and remember to take care of yourself too.