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Don't confuse the grief you are feeling with guilt, it's perfectly normal to grieve the loss of the life you had together. His continuing decline is inevitable at this point and I think going back is only wishful thinking, instead focus on ways you can enhance his life (and yours too) within this new reality.
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That has been debated for years on this site.

I, personally, would not bring him back home for any reason. Every time you have to 'return' him back to the NH, it will bring back all the sad feelings-and since you say he seems content--why not let it be?

You BOTH need to adapt, so take time to do so.

Don't let GUILT rule your thoughts and actions. What you are really feeling is GRIEF that is totally normal and to be expected. You're going to be OK.

((Hugs))
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Why did you make the very difficult decision to place him in Memory Care?
Have ANY of those factors changed for the BETTER?
Is he going to be safer at home?

The fact that he is content where he is makes it so much easier for both of you.
At this point he is not asking to go home.

You are not your "old self" again.
You are a loving wife that has a spouse in Memory Care. You are now going to have to manage his care. You are going to have to make sure that he is taken care of. But you can be his WIFE again. Not the person changing his soiled briefs, PJ's and bed clothes. When you visit you can take a walk with him, sit and have a lunch, watch a movie, whatever he wants to do. Hold his hand and just be.
You will be lost for a while. This change is harder on you then on him.

The "sadness" that you see in him may not be sadness but with dementia emotions are lost and this is Apathy. The emotions of joy, sadness, love are very much diminished if not lost all together.
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geddyupgo Sep 2023
Well said and so very true!
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