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I've been dealing with something similar with my brother and my mother. You need a certificate of incompetence (it may be called something else where you are) which will prevent your mother from going to another lawyer, changing the Power of Attorney, and moving out of the care facility. Talk to the facility where your Mom lives and give them details of what is going on. Also, since you are the DPOA, talk with your mother's lawyer to get some accurate legal guidance. Keep in mind, that unless someone answering on this forum identifies him/herself as a lawyer, none of us can give legal advice. The staff at the nursing home are your best friends, keep in touch with them. (In my situation, my mother was recently, and to my shock, declared "competent of person," meaning she has the right to decide where she wants to live. However, she does not have legal or financial competency, so she cannot change lawyer, POA, or her will, or decide how to spend her money.) Good luck; I feel your pain.
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If your mother has dementia, how do you know what she is saying is even true? Have you spoken to your cousin about this directly? If you can't talk to him for whatever reason, suggest that he sit down with you and the doctor of the facility and discuss her diagnosis and the fact that she will say things she doesn't mean, etc. as a result.
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If she has not been deemed mentally incompetent she can do what she wants.
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Since her dementia is causing her behaviors, just tell the facility no one is to see or take her out of the facility without your permission. Yes, the nephew can be arrested for adult endangerment, but I don't think it will come to that because the facility can be sued if they allowed him to remove her. Above all, GET YOUR INSTRUCTIONS IN WRITING TO THE FACILITY, have the administrator sign it, and give a copy to the police. Then mail a certified copy to the nephew informing him of your intentions too. That way, no one can say they didn't know your (your mother's signed DPOA) instructions. Good luck!
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Yes do what lilith53 says. I had to do exercise my dpoa as well as only thing was my grandma didn't want to change it, it was my cousin who tried using a false document to become her guardian and release her to into her care. Please whatever you do, don't feel guilty or bad. You are protecting your mother and yourself. Good luck!
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I believe her doctors can declare her incompetent to sign a new DPOA....a diagnosis
of dementia in itself might be all you need. Keep talking to the home and medical professionals as they have already determined she cannot be alone as it would be dangerous for her to do so. I doubt that the facility would allow him to move her...they could be sued. He's just a nephew and you a daughter with power of attorney. Have you asked the facility what they would do if he tries...I believe they would call the police themselves. Going to court would be a waste of money as no court is going to give him DPOA. Good luck and don't worry too much..just cover things with her doctor and the facility.
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