My mother is saying nasty ,sexual things to the staff at the rehab she's at ..I have never heard such nasty piggy language come from her mouth ..besides saying nasty things she's telling staff while I'm there that I'm sleeping with them and she is hostile it's embarrassing and she is also hitting staff and just plain mean...how the heck do I handle this? This is unlike her and the psych dr came in and started her on depakote , I hope it starts kicking in soon , the other dr previously put her on seroquel and it was horrible..ughhh , she's only been on depakote for 3 days ...I cannot take this awful nasty piggy stuff she says ..how do I get her to stop being so mean and nasty ....? Help !!! Seroquel was not the med for her ,,I hope the depakote starts working soon
To me, the hitting her caregivers is more serious than her speech, and I certainly hope a drug can calm her down and prevent this!
It is understandable that her piggy language is very upsetting for you. Keep firmly in mind that this is Not Your Fault. There is no need for you to be embarrassed over what your mother does. You have no control over this.
In a very real sense, this is Not Your Mother's Fault, either. It is due to the damage in her brain. It is impossible to become an adult without those words and those images entering our brains. We have strong social/moral filters that keep us from using the words. Social filters are among the first casualties of dementia.
I never heard my husband use a cuss word until he had dementia. Obviously those kinds of words were in his brain all along, but he used restraint when he was well.
Keep working with the doctor to find a reasonable chemical restraint on mom's speech and behavior. If depakote is not it, keep trying. And try very hard not to take mom's outrageous statements personally, or to feel as if you had said these things. Not Your Fault. Not Mother's Fault. The blame is squarely on the brain damage caused by dementia.
Hoping psych consult goes well.