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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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I can’t help but wonder if men have a harder time with this than women because of childbirth. There’s no modesty in childbirth…. And other stuff can come out that aren’t babies… I know I’m a lot more devil-may-care after having my two.
But, in regards for advice, I think the first thing you should do is acknowledge his feelings. It would be embarrassing, especially the more cognizant you are, and modest. Maybe call the nurse in so there three of you can talk about it together? Maybe you can create a “bathroom plan” with the focus to reduce his anxieties as much as possible, like playing music that will help him think of other things, using a plug-in wipe warmer, and maybe a little reward wouldn’t go amiss? Maybe he gets a small treat every time he calls?
The nice thing about being in a place like a hospital or a rehab place is that frankly, you're just another body to a nurse. Sure, she can be kind and talk to you, but she doesn't lose sleep over you, and your naked body is no more embarrassing or exciting to her than a Toyota Corolla is to a mechanic. It is what it is.
Try to get your husband to just get over it, because the only person worrying about his dignity is himself. It's a bit of a "if a tree falls over in the forest, does anyone hear it" scenario -- If hubby's the only one concerned about his losing his dignity in front of a nurse, is he really losing his dignity?
I know when the day comes that my husband ever goes into the hospital, he'll be exactly the same way. He cannot fathom the indignities that go along with being a patient, but of course, having given birth three times and experiencing a lifetime of OB/Gyn visits and mammograms, I have zero sympathy for anyone freaking out about having some see their personal parts.
My FIL adjusted to this with grace. Kept it short, always polite, factual but without oversharing.
"Excuse me Nurse, could you please help me to the bathroom. Thank you".
Done.
Oh & PS: does he needs incontinence briefs as mobility makes it hard to get there in time? Well. He if needs 'em he needs 'em! Ask him to use his common sense.
I wore incont. briefs when heavily pregnant as mobility & stress incont were issues - then afterwards for many months due to muscle damage.
Shirley - ask him if he thinks wetting or soiling himself is more dignified than asking for assistance....
Have you ever considered both of you moving into a care home? It seems to me that way you would both be happier because you could be together and he would still have the benefit of many caregivers.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
But, in regards for advice, I think the first thing you should do is acknowledge his feelings. It would be embarrassing, especially the more cognizant you are, and modest. Maybe call the nurse in so there three of you can talk about it together? Maybe you can create a “bathroom plan” with the focus to reduce his anxieties as much as possible, like playing music that will help him think of other things, using a plug-in wipe warmer, and maybe a little reward wouldn’t go amiss? Maybe he gets a small treat every time he calls?
Try to get your husband to just get over it, because the only person worrying about his dignity is himself. It's a bit of a "if a tree falls over in the forest, does anyone hear it" scenario -- If hubby's the only one concerned about his losing his dignity in front of a nurse, is he really losing his dignity?
I know when the day comes that my husband ever goes into the hospital, he'll be exactly the same way. He cannot fathom the indignities that go along with being a patient, but of course, having given birth three times and experiencing a lifetime of OB/Gyn visits and mammograms, I have zero sympathy for anyone freaking out about having some see their personal parts.
My FIL adjusted to this with grace. Kept it short, always polite, factual but without oversharing.
"Excuse me Nurse, could you please help me to the bathroom. Thank you".
Done.
Oh & PS: does he needs incontinence briefs as mobility makes it hard to get there in time? Well. He if needs 'em he needs 'em! Ask him to use his common sense.
I wore incont. briefs when heavily pregnant as mobility & stress incont were issues - then afterwards for many months due to muscle damage.
I needed them. I wore them.
Have you ever considered both of you moving into a care home? It seems to me that way you would both be happier because you could be together and he would still have the benefit of many caregivers.