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Wolfflower....I live on my social security and his and we have Anunities that pay us once a year and another account a small portion every month. I budget very carefully and pay all the credit cards in full each month. I buy nothing unless we need it. The most expensive cost we have is food. We have good health care Medicare and Suplimental and we have drug insurance. I was a Realtor for 40 years and always paid both sides of my social security but only get one side. Very unfair. It is not easy, but we do it. I must not go into our savings as I will need it when my Partner passes. We own our home free and clear but have an HOA payment each month. I tell you, it is budget time. Big Time..
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Oregongirl, thank you for your heartfelt concern. I am sorry that I did not make it clear my father died (2008). I traveled all the routes for help.
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some of the above is true and correct, but,: My wife was in a facility 3 month post hospital. As a paraplegic who can't manage hygiene needs, and needed help, I helped when ever I could, and while I was around, which was every day, all day till late evening. As they usually are understaffed, I helped when there was only one CNA, with tasks like turning my wife, cleaning, etc. At some point
the CNA'S started taking me for granted and expected me to help, to the point where I had back pain. Yes, they might be over worked, but the reason we have our loved ones there, is to care for them. If you can't do it, do not open a business to advertise your wonderful care, and do not employ people who do not want to work. And for employees, do not apply for a job you do not want to do. There are plenty others looking for that job, that do want to do it.
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My father was private pay. We asked for no financial discounts. The NH did not provide the care it said it would. My husband, who often helped, and I were actually "freeing up" their employees. Go figure!
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I read about this today: New York nursing home nightmare (published July 5, 2015)
timesledger/stories/2015/27/nursinghome_2015_07_03_q.html
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Judy, I read the article and wrote a comment. I was surprised there were no comments. God help anyone I see treating anyone like they did. Scares me as to what it will be like when and if I have to go to one of these places. I will fight back as hard as I can.
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My husband is in a care facility its a good one was getting respect etc. Until new admins came and a new don. They dont like me because im a hands on person advocate and these people dont like family members who are hands on or a advocate i scream and scream even call them incompetent all they do is threaten me and tell me move him. I cant because my dr wants him there. How can i make them not threaten me no 1. If i call dept of health or anyplace else they will find out and definate start moving him
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I think we live in a time when the endemic culture of assisted living facilities and of nursing homes has survived with a big disconnect between what is actually happening in the rooms with these patients, and what anybody else can see or believe, and everything follows from there. But I think as supervisors find ways to use cameras, and families find ways to make having cameras in the room standard procedure, this whole world will undergo a big transformation. There are many good caregivers who are not adequately appreciated, but the underworld survives easily where it cannot be seen. Once again, my NEST camera is a God send. I sort of wonder how one month of watching her room 24/7 would change your willingness to have her there. I have held my tongue on so many things I could pick on, because the smaller stuff is just not worth it. But I have made a point to send positive feedback 3-4x for any complaint I choose to make officially (only one so far, when they borrowed a charger for Mom's IPAD for the night).
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Still NH admins or anyother employees in a facility should not threaten family members that is also included chairman of the board who lies and cover up for her admins. I wish i could put a camera in his room but they wont allow it. Ive had trouble with employees stealing my husband shirts and they looked on there cameras one in front of his room and they kept telling no what a bunch of bs. They just dont want family to know anything well rhis one will always complain any yell and i know there tricks and games which they dont like
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It's different everywhere. My mom's place is on the list of 'not good' nursing homes, but every single other nursing home is 'not good'. The 'good' ones have a 2-3 year waiting list, if not more, and do not take Medicaid (or if they do, the Medicaid beds are spoken for months and months ahead of time). I would just make a list of the horrors you have seen, take pictures or videos, and complain complain complain to everyone you can think of. Nothing much will change, though, these complaints have gone on for decades and nothing much happens to make things better. Keep complaining, and I suppose go up there all the time as a 'watchdog'. Good luck. It's an ugly situation, but so common.
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I feel so bad for those of you who are in "bad" care facilities. My mom has been in a dem/alz. facility for 6 years and I must say it is one of the good ones (north Texas area). A new co. bought out the old one and although I have seen some changes as in a lot of the staff that I loved and trusted have moved on or been replaced, I haven't see any huge problems. I make sure that I come and go at different times to get a better sense of how the system works and to throw off an;y staff that might not care. So far I haven't seen that. I do know that there are terrible places along with terrible caregivers. It's a shame and I don't have the answers. Wish there was a better way of hiring or screening for these things. You can check a persons background history but if a place hires someone because they are desperate for staff knowing that they are not fit and have abused then that's on the company or owner and needs to be addressed. I hate to have more govt. red tape but SOMEone needs to do something about this horrible problem before I get there! Hope my son doesn't live in thousands or miles away.....
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