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My mother passed away in may of this year and my father has gone so far down hill. he says he has given up and ready to be with momma! My sister and my brother go over there but i cant i live in texas. I am very concerned he says he don't eat or shower ir anything else for that matter. he is really sick he has OCPD he only has 25% lung function and yes he smokes and drinks, he has for years! He is drinking away his pain!!! What do i do??? PLEASE HELP!!!!!!

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You don't mention how old your father is. I think the situation is a little different for someone 68 than for someone 87.

As Seastar says, it would be good if your local siblings could conact his doctor and either the Office of Aging or Social Services. Depression sounds likely.

So, see what can be done. But at some point, accept that Father may be justified in "giving up" ... it may be a matter of recognizing and accepting that his time is near. Again, age makes a big difference in this respect.
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Please call the Area Aging Office in his area. They will help asess what he might qualify for and this will give you a place to start. This sounds like a depression and a call to his doctor might be the tip off they need to help him. Schedule and 'unrelated' appointment (ie, "Dad, they would like to check your blood pressure or want to make sure your medicines are doing what they should" and have an honest talk to the doctor. It is ok to excuse yourself, when the doctor leaves, so you can catch the doc in the hallway if needed to have a conversation without your Dad present. Communicate with siblings, so everyone is on the same page and no one feels left out.

All the very best to you! It's a difficult journey, this gain and loss process. You are a very caring person to have asked about what to do. You got this, you can do it. :)
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