We took in my MIL 4 months ago with the understanding that my SIL would sell the house ASAP. She didn’t even start to sell it until we threatened to take my MIL back to the house. The house still hasn’t sold despite there being multiple reasonable offers. We are mentally burned out. My husband and are both disabled and can’t do this any more. I’ve told my SIL this with no results. She has financial POA. What are our options?
Depending on where you live, your home is considered your MIL’s residence and you’d have to go through a court process if she doesn’t want to leave. Even if she hasn’t paid anything to live there, she could still be considered a tenant. Check your state laws on this.
You can’t force another person to take care of her regardless if it’s her own daughter. Sounds good on paper to essentially knock on SIL’s door and leave her mother on the porch for her to deal with but be careful. It could turn out the way you want but it could be a legal nightmare.
I’d contact your local Human Services Agency on Monday and get the ball rolling on having MIL evaluated for placement somewhere. Give them SIL's name, address, and phone number and tell them she is POA and to contact her in regard to everything. Once SIL has some responsibility dropped on her, and has to answer to someone with authority, I’m betting she’ll get off her behind.
Have her belongings delivered to SIL house .
POA is just for financial and Medical. The assigned person is not obligated to care for the principle or be at their beck and call. But, they can hire someone to do the care. Clean the house, mow the lawn, all out of the principles money. Its the POAs responsibility to place the principle when needed.
Your option is to drop MIL off on SILs front doorstep, lock stock and barrel, citing your inability to care for her any longer. SIL dragging her feet with the home sale has now caused you and DH extreme anxiety and health issues from caring for MIL while being ignored by SIL.
I'll bet that home will be sold immediately and MIL will be placed in the blink of an eye. Empathy is earned thru scar tissue, and it's now SILs turn to see what it feels like to earn her title.