I’ll try and make this short. My sister and her husband live in mom’s house. Mom is retired, 82 and has short term memory loss and now, cancer. I live out of state and visit as much as I can, talk to her every day and offer some financial assistance. My sister because she helps pay mortgage and is a care giver tells me she owns the house with her husband. She is also POA. Though mom is still alive I made it very clear sister does not own the house until mom is no longer with us she is adamant that she and husband are partial owners. Paying mortgage does not make one the owner but she doesn’t let it sink in. I wanted to visit and spend more time with mom as I do not have the financial resources to pay for hotels this would be the best option. I would assist with some bills and spend time with mom walking, cooking etc. (whatever needs to be done). I am told I can stay at the house only after her my sister speaks to her husband. Now there have been NO domestic disputes whatsoever and I have no criminal record. Sister has a type a persona and controls all around her with an iron fist, unfortunately I do not agree. Given my mom’s fragile situation I did get upset over the issue and told her via phone. What legal reason does my sibling have to contest she owns the house and not allow family to stay? Sorry I’ve no one to turn to and I am frustrated that she acts in such poor manner given there are only the three of us left alive in the family sister, brother and mom. Any tips or opinions would be gladly reviewed even if not in my favor. Thanks!
Haven't seen a response in a few days. I think perhaps our message has gotten through.
While the home situation is different and she’s currently in a skilled facility getting rehab, she will not be able to go home after this and we are making accommodations for her to move into our home which is also our farm. I can see where if my brother was just telling me “hey I’m coming to visit mom for a week tomorrow and staying there (which is totally how he would operate)” I would be a bit put off and tell him I need to discuss with my wife. He has no idea what appointments, errands we have to take her to or what’s on our schedule.
try something like “hey sis, I want to visit mom, would you mind letting me stay a few days and when would be a good time?” You get more bees with honey than you do with poo, which mainly just brings flies. I’m running a lot of errands for her, interfacing with her attorney, doctor, rehab care team and handling her business affairs. Because of this I already have little time to myself because my wife can’t really help since she sees patients all day and can’t just take off work whenever. Perhaps your sister is just wore down and spends her free time caregiving and her husband pitches in after he gets off work and that’s why she’s checking with him, because she wants to say “do you think we can make some time for brother or should we make plans for another time soon.”
cooler heads prevail