My mom is frail, 88, chronic dementia and 95% bedridden. She has been at a CA licensed residential Board and Care for a few months, many weeks of which she was away in hospital or SNF. Her Physician Orders for Life-Sustaining Treatment (POLST) has been in place for three years, indicating her wishes of DNR and Limited Medical Treatment, the details of which are included in her advance directive. On Monday, she was found unresponsive and without a pulse. The caregiver called 911 and then called me. I later discovered through the admission report and the EMT statements that the caregiver had administered chest compressions prior to their arriving. Mom is not doing well and is in a lot of pain, the entire attending hospital staff knows what happened and is astounded, as am I. I called the owner of the facility to ask why this happened. He denied it, stating that the staff is not allowed to touch the patient, just to call 911 when there is a DNR in place. He called me back after a few minutes, following an inquiry to the residence. His story changed and said that the caregiver had started the chest compressions at the instruction of the 911 dispatcher. (since when do these instructions override a legal document?) I have filed a complaint with the CA licensing board, what else can I do?
In regards to the ALF staff stating, "Don't worry, if she falls again, we'll call an ambulance like we always do" when you were at the ALF and found your mother trying to stand on her own. The ALF staff might have be quoting the policy and procedure for "What to do when a resident falls." Our ALF staff are NOT allowed to assist an resident off of the floor, the rescue squad has to be called every time and they have to assist the resident off of the floor. (Sounds stupid, right?) BUT that is what their POLICY is.
Talk to the Nursing Supervisor or Director and ask her what the policies and procedures are for assisting someone off of the floor after they have fallen. That way YOU will know WHAT TO EXPECT if your Mom ever does fall at the ALF.
Sometimes what we expect the nursing staff TO DO or NOT DO for our loved ones, is not the same as what the facility's Policies and Procedures are. As a result, the nursing staff is put in the middle between family members who want certain things done a certain way and the facility; because legally the nursing staff are required to follow the facility's Policies and Procedures (and if they do not, they can get into trouble with their State Board of Nursing for NOT following the P&P.) So how does the nursing staff serve "two masters" while also taking care of the resident??? Something to think about.
I am glad that you have made arrangements for your Mom to receive hospice care at a new facility with private pay caregivers and that you have arranged that the caregivers will NOT call 911 if something happens with your Mom.
I think that you need to focus on your Mom as she is today and not worry about what "might have been". You cannot change the past, but you can make your last days and weeks with your Mom as happy and memorable as possible. Look at old photos, ask her about the stories behind the photos. Do a audio or video history with your Mom. Ask her if there are special items or belongings that she wants to give to a specific person. Enjoy the time that you have with her.