He has cancer. I want Nothing to do with him. Hate him. I am age 60 living in a city called Ft. Wayne. My Brother is 63 living in an apartment by himself in a small town 45min. south of me. We haven't spoken in years and can't stand the lazy, worthless sob, as since My Father died in 2009, he has done NOTHING for my Mother who is now in assisted living. Am I responsible for taking care of an older brother who is in dying health?? NO way is he living with me !!! He smokes marijuana & is not a nice person. PLEASE, help with any answers, Thanks.
Are you being asked to care for him? Are you concerned because you feel guilty for not wanting to help him or worry that you will feel guilty when he passes?
Would he feel guilty if the situation was reversed and you needed help that he didn't want to give? Bet you know that answer to that question since you have been living it for a decade.
You have enough to do taking care of your mom and yourself. At most, I would make the effort for your mom to see him if she wants to. Give her a chance to say her goodbyes.
Wishing you strength as you navigate this situation.