A woman has taken a fancy to him and they were found together in bed (fully clothed). She also goes into another man's room. NH checking them every 30 minutes. Both are mobile. Don't want him put out as his dementia is profound. What can I do, as it is a secure dementia ward. 😦😦
facilities can be lonely and the days drag on
As long as he does not object to the attention I would say let things go.
We all need contact with other people. The touch, clothed or not is very powerful. It can be calming and may help your brother mentally and emotionally.
I know when my Husband was anxious all I had to do is hold him, or hold his hand, rub his shoulders and he would relax almost instantly. I could get him to fall asleep in minutes just by holding his hand and sitting or laying next to him.
So as long as the facility has no problems with this, as long as the woman's family does not have a problem I would not worry about this.
I do not think you have to worry about the facility kicking him out due to this, if they make moves to do so they should also evict the woman. And they would have a discussion with the families before it cam to that.
Next month I will moderate(in Belgium) as gerontologist a four day session embracing "Age love and sexualité" Participants are between 65 an 80
Good luck
Yves
Belgium
That they can find some comfort and peace should be encouraged and not destroyed. Love comes in many different forms, be happy that they are able to recognize it in their conditions. It is a blessing to them.
companionship. All you can do is ask that you be informed of issues arising. By taking your brother away from that environment will only unsettle him.
Staff will monitor him and others. Remember he has advanced dementia.
All the best,
Arlene
I used to joke with them that they got more "action" that I did--still had all 5 kids at home--
But I am grateful for that little gift they had. When daddy had to move to a "hospital bed" their time like that ended.
If your brother isn't complaining--leave it be. We NEED human touch. I know that on my worst day--a great big hug from a grandkid or one of my precious sons in law just makes it all OK. MY DH is not someone who wants/needs "touch". Very lonely at times.