I'm a bit distraught today because I got into a bad fight with my brother regarding my mom.
I texted him yesterday to say that I'm hearing lots of people are getting sick with covid who are vaccinated ie mom's hairdresser told us she had 4 cancellations yesterday etc. I asked if we could discuss how safe it was to bring mom to xmas eve dinner (23 people) and xmas day lunch (11 people). He got very angry in his text response and told me he is tired of this subject and we just won't go anywhere anymore - end of discussion - don't want to talk about it. I was so sad that he doesn't have the capacity to engage with me who is mom's primary caregiver 24/7. Later, I told mom to talk to him and he really wants to go, we will go. I was upstairs when mom asked him last night about going and I overheard he said "stop, I don't want to discuss this anymore, etc etc" and so it infuriated me and I went downstairs and read him the riot act and in front of my frail mom ...he didn't react and continued to watch tv.... I left the house with mom begging me not to go. I lost my temper and I feel that I ruined mom's health, xmas and my relationship with my brother (my brother and I don't talk much since he doesn't communicate feelings, etc). This all started with me just asking if he thought it would be safe to take mom. Omricron is raging in NYC right now and so many vaccinated people I know are getting covid. My mom had covid. She is boosted. But she has heart failure, diabetes and hypertension and was hospitalized once already w covid in March 2020. Was I in the wrong to worry about taking her to a party of 23 family members (all vaccinated but not all boosted and many school kids and young adults)? My brother and I never fought in 60 yrs since we don't talk much to each other but this left us all rattled - I really lost my temper for 1 minute.