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I stay a week with my Mom once a month,. She has dementia and cannot be left alone, my siblings and I take turns staying with and taking care of her.

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Hopefully some will learn from this to save for those rainy days so they won't be doing the same to their own children or grandchildren when they get older.

What is scary is that our own generation have saved less than that of our parents generation, and the next generation even less. But each generation is living longer.
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My parents didn't make good choices but they lived a good life and had fun. My Mother never worked she lived with us after my Father died. I am on social security and my husband also. We never had help from the government or anyone. Now my Mother needs me and I will not let her down. We have always helped her with everything and she helped us raise our children. I don't expect the government to do much. Just let caregivers have a way to use their expenses and not have to pay small business tax on all the money that is paid to us caregivers. I have a contract with the VA to pay myself $800.00 per month for caregiving out of my Mother's pension which is $1100.
I spend this money on caring for my Mother anyway. I just object to paying the tax on it like I am a small business. So I spend the caregiver money on her and I pay the IRS for the caregiver money. I can't deduct any expenses. So after all is done she is getting less. If I work I have lots of money to spend on her and pay little taxes usually because of our medical bills and I itemize on the 1040. It doesn't seem fair. There is no way I could ever get someone to do what I do and pay them $800.00 per month. I guess no one on this site gets it, but their are hundreds of caregivers out in the world going under selling everything they can to get by to take care of their parent. I am blessed. I got the Aid and Attendance pension for my Mother in 4 months. It helps a lot since I don't work part time anymore. So we can make this work and I take out of my savings to pay the CPA and the IRS. Most families are prepared for emergencies and the others have rich relatives that step in to help. I just feel sorry for the ones that are trying to do like I am doing and don't know what I know or have advantages and blessing that I have. I always come out smelling like a rose when I jump into a pile of crap. I just care about people and want them to have a light at the end of the tunnel when this is all done. I was searching on Google and it is sad all of the caregivers down to just about nothing. But they all seem to be survivors like me and keep on keep on keeping on. They must make too much for welfare and fall thru the cracks.
Okay, I'm done now!
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College, the ideas are good about lobbying.... but one has to stop and think, imagine how much money it would take for the Federal and State government to give money to the elderly so that they can live comfortably, or money to the grown children because the child resigned from the workforce by choice.

There are over 40,000,000 senior citizens out there in the U.S. alone. On average if a working person quits work to care for a parent he/she will lose over the years between $285,000 and $325,000 which includes loss of salary, plus net worth loss of the health insurance, loss of pension, loss of other benefits such as matching 401k, etc. [source: Reuters 5/30/12].... multiply those amounts by 40,000,000. That would bankrupt the United States.

No child should have to use their own money to pay to care for a parent. The parent should offer to pay from their own retirement fund. And if the house is not elder proof, it is time to think about down sizing and relocating to a home that is safer. I realize we have many elders there who refuse to move. My parents are one, but I refuse to enable them.

Guess I am lucky as my parents saved for those rainy days... of course now trying to get them to blow the dust off their wallets is a different matter :P
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College, if you no longer have a job, then how do you owe any taxes to get tax credits for?

If you are use to always getting what you wanted, you may have just hit a brick wall.
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This is a joke, their must be something we can do to get the tax credits we need for being a caregiver. They don't care. If you are a person who is not on welfare they just let you fall thru the cracks with you elder parent. We quit our jobs and charge up our credit cards trying to keep them happy and comfortable. Build ramps that cost a couple thousand by code, etc. Do we lobby when we ever get a chance so we can help others? Would that work? Maybe if we become the sqeaky wheel someone will listen. I guess I could start with senators, AARP, VA and Aging care places around me. I am tied down right now but I still have a mouth and a computer. I use to be on debating teams in school and always got what I wanted. Please advise. I hate to take all of the no answers I have been getting for the 3 years I have been doing this caregiver position.
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Depending on your age (over 65 and getting that big flat deduction) I've discovered (so far) there's no reason to try itemizing all the medical expenses including mileage. Spouse, 93, keeps insisting they are deductible, but the big senior generic deduction is way higher than the expenses so far. Best thing to recoup these is a medical reimbursement account so you can submit what you've paid out of pocket and get reimbursed.
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I had substantial expenses one year, including building a ramp, and my tax preparer said it was NOT tax deductable. Ask, but do not get your hopes up
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I believe you can only deduct mileage if you claim your Mom as a "dependent" on your income taxes. You may want to verify that with the IRS or a income tax preparer.
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