I have a meeting in the morning with the administrator and received an email with links to download the paperwork we will be discussing tomorrow. My husband will be a private pay resident with a very generous long term care policy. I will be making up the daily discrepancy from the 356.35 he is allowed per day out of pocket and will not be reimbursed for the approximate $70 daily. I will be paying them a month in advance for his care. I am not comfortable disclosing all of our assets to them. Can they legally demand this and refuse to admit him without this information? We are in Indiana. What is a more acceptable and less invasive "proof" of our ability to pay.
I am very well satisfied with how the meeting went and my husband is currently a resident in their memory care unit.
I too suggest you see an Elder Lawyer
That being said, I would only provide sufficient information to demonstrate you can pay for the care on an ongoing basis (at least for a year or two). NHs WANT private pay residents, so I doubt they will probe if you give them sufficient info.
Paying ahead is normal for at least some facilities. They will refund any over-payment when he is no longer there.
On your side of the equation - IF you are comfortable with walking away for this NH:
(1) I would get in writing that they will strive to provide all the necessary care for him "to attain or maintain his highest practicable physical, mental, and psychosocial well-being" (42 CFR §483.34) and not ask or require you to provide any private care. I wouldn't use the regulation's language as that will tip them off that you know your business and his rights, but find a way to amicable confirm that they will take care of him fully, and no private care will be necessary.
Note that while the law requires the NH to take care of him fully, the administrator of the "high-end" NH where my mother resided required some families to provide additional private care. Not only do I know this from those families, the administrator is on record (in a legal transcript) acknowledging this.
(2) I would make sure you can find out who actually owns the NH, and that you have the ability to communicate with the owner(s).
Clearly you did your homework and found out how much the daily cost is for your husband to be at the facility, how much the policy pays, and how much will be out of pocket. Don't pay once cent more than is owed.
Do not pay a month ahead either. Out of the question and you should refuse that. Think of it like this. If you go to a hotel for a week, do you pay for two weeks in case you may want to stay longer?
Instruct the nursing home to send you a written bill weekly, bi-weekly, or even monthly for the amount owed? Then you pay them with a bank check. DO NOT give any care facility any access to account numbers. This is your right to do so. Do not let them coerce you or trick you into signing any documents that you have not thoroughly read over or do not understand.
Take in all your LTC forms.
Sit through all the discussions with the paperswork until you are comfortable.
And the answer is yes, they will want full financials. All information including the LTC insurance.
That is the way of it.
You don't need to provide it and they don't need to accept your applications.
This is a business deal.
If you need advice of Elder Law Attorney, Care Manager, anything else, do get it now. Worth the money to keep YOURSELF protected in all this.
I know how you feel. When my brother and I were looking for his accommodations I got to telling folks "You are looking at about a million dollars on the hoof". But when it comes down to actually APPLYING, yes, they get the information or you don't get the accommodation. You are looking at reams and realms of paperwork ahead. I am sorry and wish you luck with it all. And I FEEL you.
Allowing the business office to know what their monthly income is and what the LTC policy will pay is all these people need to know.
They do not need anyone's Social Security numbers or banking information. They do not need to know nor do they have any legal right to know what a person has in their bank accounts or about any other assets they are holding.
They need to show proof that they can pay the $70 a day that the LTC policy does not cover. That is the extent of the business transaction the OP has with the nursing home.
Have you seen an Elder Law attorney to see if dividing your assets is a good way to provide protection for you?
How long will his LTCi pay?
What is your discomfort in revealing your assets (without account numbers, of course)?
Really? Are you talking about an AL in Connecticut or a NH?
My father was in a NH in this state and I disclosed no such thing. I insisted on a written bill and it was paid every month. He did not have enough assets to pay anywhere near to years of private pay.
If you get a chance, look up the laws for NHs in IN
There is a LTC policy that does not cover the $70 a day of cost.
All the OP owes the nursing home is proof that there's enough income for the $70 a day to be paid. Nursing homes do not have any right to demand that a family give them full access to their bank accounts and a full listing of every asset they have.