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There are 2 other siblings named in the trust as beneficiaries. I'm designated as Mom's POA for assets and medical in her . i'm disabled and live with Mom. Despite attempts conversations since 2001 to uncover her wishes for the titling of her assets [stock portfolio, IRAs, bank accounts and savings bonds] she doesn't guide me. i'm single, no kids and her sole care-taker. My other two surviving siblings are working and/or quite well-off. At the 2nd revision, my wealthy sister intervened without my knowledge and dealt directly with Mom's aty, and the Trust was renamed to be "Trust for [mom] and [me]" - as though our assets were joint or co-mingled, which is not the case at all. She keeps telling me 'you'll need money to live on' ... Dad [deceased 2001] insisted i was to remain in the family home. Mom on occasion says that "they're my kids, too" insisting they get their portions "immediately." i have no kids and am single- i have to take cabs to my doctor apps, spend about $1800 each month on my own RXs, and have SS as my only income. How can i FUND the trust and have accounts retitled in the name of the trust [which is in both our names, but spells out to a T that i'm responsible for insurance, upkeep, maintenance inside and out, utility bills, every cost and every incidental regarding my care and the house. If i were to need to downgrade to a smaller residence, it's spelled out that it's at my own expense. Mom fell in 12/14, and requires major shoulder surgery, and the parade of PT/OT/ Nurses and next is, a social worker, has kept me away from my own ability to pursue medical attention. i can't find the time, and i refuse to leave Mom home alone with people coming in and out. [Basement flood of 4" just took about $12,000to remedy and i still need to remodel her shower] i need to get the Trust funded before forgetfulness/ [the nurse is calling it dementia at the last visit - which helps explain the mood swings, her anger - things totally out of character for her ... she's gone from being a ray of sunlight to being mean, slap-happy, throwing things at me.... screaming at me, punching, pushing, verbally, emotionally and physically abusing me - but she will tells my sisters or nieces that i hollering at her. Yes - i'm now at the point that i do yell at her to PLEASE STOP! But it scares me what the information she tells them will come out as. i'm the one with the bruises and in trying to help her with a shower, she pushed me against a door which had a 6' thick bevel-mirrored door, causing it to shatter against my back. i'm tired, angry, hurt [she screams that she wishes i were never born or were dead]. i get no help - nor encouragement nor even questions or conversation from my sisters.

Most accounts are JT w/rights of survivorship - but there's a caveat in the Trust [both our names are in the title of the Trust though] that the JT titling was ONLY for the Mom's convenience so i could handle her banking over the past 20 years. (She's had 3 cornea transplants and doesn't see well at all).

How can i honor Mom's wishes, avoid probate, and i certainly can't afford to pay the tax on the funds just to divy out monies to my sisters. i've been trying since June just to get her to call the attorney to fix a mistake that his office made. She defies me, and all i get is: "...tomorrow....." She won't guide me regarding the stocks, etc: but she's fully aware that i cannot keep up the house whatsoever without proper titling, to honor the Trust's stipends. My hands are tied in even tending to my own affairs. Sorry for the lengthy question/s ... i'm losing much much more than sleep. i lost my Mom, to time, illness, anger and her stubbornness to either do exercises so she doesn't fall again [5 falls since Feb '15]/ thanks for your compassion, patience and advice. Is there a resource i can consultt? i can't call her attorney - he only makes things worse for me at each revision - at his own doing, and Mom doesn't correct him. i've got to get this settled though before it's known that in some obscure nurses's notes the word dementia will appear. Thank you. God bless ~

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You need elder law atty
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I agree you need to find/hire someone skilled in Elder Law to work on your behalf. Perhaps start with local senior resource line or social worker for how to find one. As the POA, you should have sole authority to deal with your mom's financial concerns when she is unable and it sounds like she is there. Her attorney should know that and work directly with you on your mother's behalf. Your sister shouldn't have any authority to change the trust unless she is the trustee. Your mother has authority to change the trustee. You need to understand your authority. I agree that it is a good idea to keep your finances separate - to pay for her needs, the household bills, and taxes out of the existing trust funds. Have an accountant to keep your taxes separate. My father has a will in which he divides up his assets by percentage for each child and we have aligned the beneficiaries of his investment accounts and insurance according to the same percentages, so that all children are covered regardless of how the investments do. Additionally, he has set up a checking account for me to use at my discretion to cover day to day expenses for him as he has limited mobility and I do all his shopping. Our siblings don't realize how much work is involved trying to manage all the details of someone else's life as well as our own. It can be a full-time job. But it sounds like they recognize your predicament and value to your mother. I recommend keeping them very informed as to your mother's medical details (in case something happens to you) and asking them for regular investment of their time to help care for her daily needs, so that you get the time you need to also take care of yourself. If they don't contribute time, then hire someone (pay out of the trust) or ask them to help you find help. As your mother's dementia progresses, it will be more difficult to put these things in place, she becomes more vulnerable, and you may take more abuse because you are more accessible. You will also be her lifeline. Hang in there.
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PS. Your mother may be avoiding doing these things on her own because she is unsure. Instead of asking her to call the attorney, make an appt to sit down with him together, so he understands that you will now be actively involved in her decision making.
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Have a lawyer look at the trust. Since it is a joint trust - that usually means it is for each of your benefits jointly or separately (as one of you predeceases the other). So all of funds in trust are for both of your benefits.

As for funding the trust - all property(house) car, bank accounts, stocks, etc. have to be retitled in the name of the trust or they will not be counted as assets of the trust. i.e. if they are not titled in name of the trust they are not a part of the trust. (See lawyer as to how to get property into trust when incapacitated trustee is involved - if you are also trustee should be OK as trusts are designed to let one trustee take over when other trustee becomes incapacitated.)

If Mom is not now capable of signing legal documents - either you will have to get guardianship and then put property, etc. into name of trust
OR leave it as it is and if she has a will beneficiaries will inherit per will - if no will siblings will share equally in all property in her possession at time of death.

Keep your money separate and trust will have no bearing on it. Only if you retitle your accounts in the name of the trust would they be included.
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If you are mom's financial POA, you should already be aware of ALL of her assets. Check her mail---she should be receiving regular statements from the various institutions & banks, as well as property tax statements and/ or mortgage statements. If she receives retiree benefits, a statement would be coming from them. Organize all of these into a spreadsheet and contact EACH one, provide them with a copy of your POA for mom. Make sure they acknowledge you---as you need to be able to manage each of those assets.
You do NOT need your sister's help on this. You have the POA---you just need to use it. Consult with an elder attorney if needed. But in my experience, you do not need to spend money on that, as much as just showing the various institutions the POA that you already have.
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Good advice from Mallory and Desert192. It sounds like you are a bit overwhelmed. Try to develop a working relationship with your mother's attorney and ask him to help guide you on the things you don't understand about your particular trust (but beware of hourly billing!). All financial institutions will want a copy of your POA on file to allow you to make financial transactions on behalf of your mother. Sounds like you and your mother have gone through a lot in the last year. You need to be able to step back from it once in awhile to get fresh perspective.
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I would think that if there are currently no assets titled into the Trust, then you don't really need it unless the estate is valued at over 5.43 million, where the estate tax kicks in. Assuming it is less than that number, another option would be to dissolve the Trust and have your's and your siblings' names added on all financial accounts and instruments, either as beneficiaries or PODs accordingly. At her passing, those accounts would be distributed directly to the beneficiaries or PODs by the financial institution, insurance company that holds the annuity, etc. If she still owns property, such as the house you are living in, your's and your siblings' names can be added to that title as well, so you all jointly own it, unless the idea was for you to have sole ownership after she passes. The estate your mother leaves would then only include her household items, car, etc. Probate should be quick with that low dollar amount for the judge to consider. This way the main assets are not subject to probate or whatever is stated in the will. Only her personal effects, furniture, household items, etc. would be covered under the Will. Seems like a simpler approach, unless, as I said, it's a high value estate - in that case I would keep the Trust in place and title everything to it. The Trust would spell out the percentage of ownership for each person listed, and divide the estate accordingly.
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ONLY an account owner can CHANGE beneficiaries. A DPOA gives absolutely ZERO power to Change Bene's, or POD, or even "dissolve" a Trust.
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If your very authoritative and snarky response above was to me, malloryg8r, my assumption was that crickett33 would have her mother accompany her when making changes to her Trust, bank account PODs and Beneficiaries. I never stated that she had the power to make those changes herself as her mother's POA. You need to learn to read better.
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ONLY an account owner can CHANGE beneficiaries. A DPOA gives absolutely ZERO power to Change beneficiaries, or POD, or "dissolve" a Trust. This is the Law in the US. I have authority to say these things very emphatically because my mom's former DPOA tried to do exactly all of that, WITH my mom accompanying them, but it was stopped because of "undue influence" (which 2nd Best has specifically decried on your other posts on AC, and I agree is illegal). I don't know what you have against me, 2nd Best, but even if you are my sister, there is such a high level of anger towards your family that cannot be solved by posting it all here, especially as a pointed rant against me (whether I'm your real sister or not). The terms of use on AC stipulates that we are all here to be helpful--misinformation is not. Someone reading your advice to just go change Bene's or Trust, with or without mom in person, would be WRONG to do so, UNLESS mom herself initiates that idea. The DPOA cannot conjure up some idea, and tell mom to do it. If she is beyond comprehending those ideas On Her Own, she is not legally able to making the changes! Any lawyer who would advise doing so, taking mom in to her bank to scribble her signature, when she is just doing it because the DPOA told her to do so. That is always wrong, but some people try to do just that, based on stuff they "read " here on AC. It's too bad you cannot go back and edit your response above and insert language to the effect that it has to be mom's idea--not some pushy kid(s) idea (s)-- to change the bene's. POA'S are personally liable for orchestrating things like that, and Lawyers get disbarred.
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Any lawyer would advise AGAINST doing so.... Would be so nice if there were an "edit" feature here on AC.
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I repeat - you need to learn to read better.
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crickett33, Since you are disabled, the Trust protects you as well as your mother. It sounds like Mom may need a nursing home soon. With the Trust in place, she will likely go on Medicaid and they will take ALL of her SS check and monthly income. Medicaid would take the house too, but since you have been her caretaker, Medicaid allows you to stay there. The Trust will provide for your needs. The Trust cannot give you any part of her check or she would be denied Medicaid funding. Before you rush to make changes that will hurt you in the long run, understand the rationale for the Trust. This sounds like a legitimate Special Needs Trust that protects both of you. Get the details.
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