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She lives with us. I need to get her in a daycare setting as I have to go back to work. She gets less than 1,000.00 a month on social security. I take care of her 24/7. She is reasonably healthy, but gets forgetful. Our financial situation changed and I need to help my husband finacially. My mom can't cook for herself or be trusted taking her meds unsupervised. An adult daycare setting would be perfect. Any suggestions greatly appreciated. My sister gave me a break but passed away two years ago so I am it alone. It does take its toll especially when she wakes you up 5 am just to talk.

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I'd suggest as your first step to contact the Area on Aging in your region to see what day programs are set up & how structured & which are "needs based" for enrollment (so if " needs based" medicaid will pay if she qualifies so then you need yo do what Pam suggests & apply). Often day programs are 4 - 6 hr blocks centered around daily lunch which may or may not be the coverage needed.

In many areas the trend right now for day care is PACE. If PACE exists, it will be daily or 3days a week type of onsite program at a PACE center. It is a medicaid waiver program. The staff @ the AoA will know if they exist & what the waiting list is like. There is a PACE by us (the Benson Center) which has Catholic Charites as its nonprofit partner & has vans that pick up folks to take them to the Benson & they have waiting list. PACE wasn't around when my mom did day programs so she went to OASIS (more a series of classes over a few weeks) & 2 different faith based senior day programs that were the 5 hrs a day type & then she went back to her home totally on her own. AoA will have a list of whats what. Also Jewish Family Services - if in your city - will have senior day programs open to all at temple or JCC.

Is mom still able to do her ADLs? My experience is that day programs are skewed for the healthier elderly, that it's not age but ability that is the criteria.......they need to be able to still walk on their own (even if slow with cane or Hugo-style walker); be able to transition from being in a van to walking into a cafeteria or hall on their own; to be able tototally potty unaided. Be able to participate in whatever event or activity scheduled....like sit through a lecture or do arts & crafts or play cards, dominos. Be able to be social for 5-6 hrs. If mom doesn't fit this picture (& be realistic), then your going to have to think about either getting daily home health care or have her get into AL or NH where she can have the oversight she needs as you & hubs cannot be there 24/7. You may not want mom to be in a NH but if she flat needs 24/7 oversight & you need to work then the choices are AL (usually private pay) or a NH on Medicaid. Even if you are a late in life baby of your mom & in your 50's, there is only so much 24/7 you can do & have your own job.

At 94, if realistically mom is not totally good on ADLs, I'd try to work with her internist or gerontologist to do whatever to get her medical chart to show the need for skilled nursing care so that she can get from her MD the note or RX that skilled care needed so she can get into a NH that takes Medicaid. For us, mom moved from her home to IL for 3years in her mid 90's. Last year in IL, she became unable to do her medication management so needed to move. Took about 6 mos of regular visits to get moms chart to show the need for skilled nursing care. If her doc seems clueless in this quest, get mom to become a patient of a MD who is also a medical director of a NH. They will know how the chart needs to read to qualify medically "at need" for NH medicaid.
Good luck, it's a lot of decisions to be made.
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First dig up 5 years of financial records to apply for VA or Medicaid. You have to account for every penny. She cannot have given anything away such as money, cars, or property within 5 years.
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Make sure she has no more than $2,000 in her account and assets -- home and car is exempt. You can spend down the money on the HOME improvement, pre-paid funeral, or a new car in her name.
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Contact your local social services office. Or the social worker @ the home
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Nolagal, it depends on how the pension distributions were set up. When my dad died I was told that the pension payments ended because he chose to have it just pay out over his lifetime rather than take a reduced amount to have it also cover my mother's lifetime. Friends and relatives were quite surprised that he would have done it this way, but with no paperwork available (his pension payments had started almost 20 years earlier), there was nothing I could do to investigate. A valuable lesson in keeping paperwork, even through a couple of moves. It has nothing to do with being a community property state.
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YES - when you start distribution you define whether you want the pension to continue on to your dependents or to stop when you pass. You get a lot more with the former type of distribution.
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I applied for Medicaid for my mom about 3 years ago. It took most of the summer asking for paperwork and then waiting for it, but I was able to get lots of the information on the phone with their bank, etc. The house your mom lives in is exempt until it is sold, as is the primary vehicle. My parents had to cash out an annuity and use if for pre-paid funeral expenses, but the funeral home director was very helpful in making sure that the paperwork was done correctly. The form did ask if my parents had given away anything of value over the past 5 years, but I just had to check no. We may have been lucky in that my parents didn't own anything of value in the first place! Yes, the agency on aging is a good resource and I got the e-mail of my mom's DHS case worker as soon as she was assigned one. Good luck!
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Thank you all for your advice. I called the local Office of the Aging and they are sending me paperwork for medicaid. To get her in the local adult day care near our home they said we would need medicaid otherwise it would be very expensive. Its a nursing home with an excellent reputation that offers this program. My mom at 94 loves to talk to people. She is very friendly.She doesn't like to be left alone so I could never think of leaving her home while I work. Its awesome not to think I am alone in this situation. Thank you everyone for taking the time to give suggestions. They are all very appreciated.
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This is a link to your local area of aging.. Call asap..

https://co.monmouth.nj.us/page.aspx?ID=170
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While Medicaid is a federal program it is administered by states which interpret its provisions. As a result every state has a little different results. If you want answers visit with an elder law attorney in your state. The process can be complicated and done incorrectly resulting in a denial or delay in benefits. You may want to start with lawyerswithpurpose
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