My husband has dementia and his neurologist will not contact the Dept. of Public Safety regarding his inability to drive. What should I do?

I don't know if the PCP or the neurologist would be the equivalent of a "mandated reporter" in regard to driving in Texas.  Some states do have laws about this and if that is the case you can warn the docs that unless they report, they could be held liable if they refuse to help get him off the road.   Big time money! 
If their are not clear laws about reporting, you could still warn them about liability concerns - I would document that I tried to get husband off the road, talked to docs, etc. and had no success.  I think a jury would come down hard on doctors ignoring this responsibility if he caused an accident.  Which is almost certain to happen.  But this is so serious morally I would just do whatever I had to - if he got nasty about it? I'd just get nasty back.  Too serious to worry about his feeling.

Yes, his PCP can contact the DPS or the DMV.

I believe that you should call the Department of Motor Vehicles in Texas and ask them if you can send an anonymous report to them.

I called about my dad in AZ and NV and was told I could report but I needed a doctor's signature to get the process rolling. I was told it is always confidential reporting.

Good luck, I know how scary this is.

He should be glad to give up driving. There are too many distracted drivers on the road today, making driving miserable .

Find a different doctor maybe? But that doesn't deal with the issues of him thinking he's ok to drive.

Have you considered taking him in to get an ID card for him to use at the Dr.'s office? He will need it for medical visits even when he does not have a valid license. It uses the same photo and document requirements and is given to people who lose (or give up) or who never had a license (I had one made for an 8year old!). When mthr was coming to live with me, I had to go by the courthouse and pick up her birth certificate and marriage license for Secure ID. i had her SSN and medicare card, and that was good enough. We went to the DMV and I asked for her to get an ID. The examiner asked me (is she giving up her license) and I said OH YES! Did she know that conversation happened - NOPE.

I also live in Texas. Dads doctor would not write a letter for us. She told us my dad would kill him self. She said it’s our family responsibility to take away keys. We got records from hospital that showed his MRI after his stroke and went to another doctor. We got that Dr to write a letter and sent it in to Austin. It has been several weeks a and have not heard anything yet. Good luck!

Maybe your husband should lose his keys and his wallet. My GFs father lost his. Always put them in his pants pocket and layed the pants over a chair. He got up one morning and couldn't find his pants. Wife told him, you can't drive without you keys and licence. He was agreeable to that. She eventually found the pants stuffed way under the mattress. By then GFs father was used to wife driving them in her car. She sold his.

If a doctor won't contact DMV then you do it. Ask if they will give DH a driving test. You can tell husband the State requires it for him to continue to drive. If its found he can't and he drives his own car, then get rid of it. Do not allow it to sit at your home. If he insists on driving, tell him he is not allowed to drive your car. Keep ur keys where u can get to them, he can't and keep your car locked.

In Texas you can anoymously report concerns of unsafe driving to DPS. Sometimes that’s the best way to address problems with an elderly neighbor or family member. It doesn’t require a physician to start the process.

You have to do it in writing (or email) and you’ll need to provide details before they start an investigation.

I completely understand I am in same situation only my husband is 84

Well I can tell you what my dad's doctor said about his driving - he said that he didn't want to have to go to court if my dad killed someone. Perhaps you should casually mention this to the doctor. A neurologist might be more likely to fill out form to send to DMV, or even an eye doctor.

The DMV has a form that an be completed that will cancel his drivers license. Contact your local state dept of motor vehicles

Here is the link for instructions for anonymously reporting an unsafe driver in Texas by email or regular mail:
www.dps.texas.gov/DriverLicense/MedicalRevocation.htm

Scroll to the bottom of the page to the heading: Report Concerns of Unsafe Drivers

I hope this helps! You are doing the right thing.

You can contact the state department of highway safety y ourself. They will guide you.

I told my husband that with the medication he was taking he could not drive. I just kept telling him this and he really did not argue.
He did however find the keys once and drove. I reported it to the police I had cancelled the credit card and was told by the police that I probably should not have done that as it could have made finding him easier. (He did not use the credit card anyway)
Do hide the keys, I have a small safe that I kept them in if they were not attached to me. (I keep the keys on a clip that I clip to a belt loop)
The facilitator at a support group I attend had a mechanic put a shut off switch under the dash on the car so her husband could not get the car started even if he got hold of the keys.
I also changed the touch pad on the inside of the garage to a pad that you have to enter a code into in order to open the door so he could not just hit the up pad to get out that way. And I kept the remote that is usually kept in the car with the keys in the safe so he could not open the car and get out by opening the garage. Or there were times I would leave the remote in the car but lock the car while it was in the garage.
I just figured I had to keep at least 2 steps ahead of him. Made for some interesting days!

Have him evaluated by a geriatrician. Then have him have a driving evaluation to see if he is qualified safe to drive. The geriatrician can facilitate this. If he doesn’t pass, it is no longer your fault. Good luck.

Set up an Uber account. Tell him you have hired him a driver. Give him a card with the number on it.

I think the legality pattern went when being released from the hospital one of the written directions is "no driving" as it is for many, maybe even most patients after surgery or major illness being released from hospital.  Then a doctor clears them in writing which goes into their chart or can be handed to them if they need proof, until then Insurance probably has an out and one is opened up for all kinds of legal issues if they drive. There is the hitch, was your husband ever told not to drive by a doctor or medical professional or given directions not to after a hospital stay? If so and no one has actually signed off on him being able to again tell him you could both be in big trouble legally and with insurance company.

You shouldn't have to be the villain here just the person carrying out the doctors orders. Why the neurologist wont help with this is baffling to me but really his PCP or any other medical professional should be able and willing to lay down the law with him. I'm not sure if it exists in your state but where my mom lives they have some offshoot of PT that evaluates a patients ability to drive again, kind of like OT but without the actual therapy. Stroke victims, Dementia, Parkinson's as well as patients with mobility issues who want to be signed off on driving again but whos therapists and or doctors aren't ready to take the responsibility of signing off on that get referred to this evaluation. So my mom for instance who really wanted to drive again and felt she could after her stroke was given this option but deep down she must have known she wouldn't pass because she didn't push for us to make that appointment. I think it was easier for her to have that option/possibility out there than actually loosing her license. It has since expired (I think) and was never renewed. When she moved home though the topic kept coming up, she had a license and wanted us to let her just drive to the store and we squashed that by telling her the insurance company and doctors told us we could be sued personally if she were to have an accident after a stroke without being signed off by a doctor and we knew about it. She did want us getting into trouble yet she never pushed to have that evaluation. Anyway it was her ST's and doctors who took the responsibility for not signing off on her driving again but they gave her an option to prove them wrong too so no one was the ultimate culprit. Maybe there is something like that where you are too. In the end though, if all the medical professionals are going on record as saying he can drive (which is what they are doing by not saying no when asked specifically)I'm not sure what tools you have. I would have DH or you ask specifically in an appointment face to face, put doctor on the spot so they have to say yes or no to your DH.

I've seen this pop up a couple of times, this is where I jump in. Don't over-complicate this for yourself and stress about how to get the state, police, doctors, or anyone else to evaluate, then "tell" someone with dementia to stop driving- BECAUSE IT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE! Everyone with dementia is different, but for the most part, even if you go to the ends of the earth to get documentation telling them they can't drive anymore (which you probably won't get, most states treat this as a "family issue" and will not get involved)...

The person with ALZ/dementia simply will not remember that they can't drive anymore, or why they can't, or care. Period. Does not matter how many times you tell them, how many times you may show them whatever piece of paper you can get that clearly states they can't drive anymore, for whatever reason, or which agency/authority issues it. You can even have a nice policeman come to visit to talk to them (we tried that too)!
It is simply pointless. There will usually be absolutely no recollection of any kind of issue or restriction with their driving, and if you try to explain otherwise, or show a nice official-looking document, it's a fight that is promptly forgotten anyway, and then you're right back to the beginning. You're the liar, they know what they're doing, etc., so save yourself the struggle that WILL ensue, no matter what form it takes. Here are the steps to take to solve this problem:

1. Hide keys/Disable, then sell car.
2. Lie. Say whatever you have to, you can change the story every day, it won't matter. Sound mean? It's not.
3. Feel NO GUILT WHATSOEVER. You have just saved at least one life, probably several more. If anything, you can feel like a hero, because you are.
4. Review steps 1-3.

I don't mean to sound flippant or disrespectful, but this is way too important to worry about how they might feel about the loss of their independence, or what they'll say when told they can't drive. This is LIFE or DEATH, and I have been here and found out the hard way what can happen if you don't step in and end this foolishness of even considering letting them continue to drive, or, in our case, not making sure beyond the shadow of a doubt that they cannot get into or start the car once you get to the point where their driving is no longer an option.

We had to finally hide the keys from my dad with ALZ. He had a 3rd keyless-entry/ignition fob that none of us knew about. We'd already been going through the battle of trying to explain to him why he couldn't drive anymore, he was totally uninterested in that. He can't remember that he has ALZ, that he hadn't driven in 2 years, or any of the incidents that led up to cessation of driving privileges. Remember that- driving is a privilege, not a right. We had the doc tell him he couldn't drive anymore, you should've heard the language and insults hurled at the doc from this man who abhorred foul language while he was still himself. We'd hidden all the keys, or so we thought, but he had another keyless entry fob stashed somewhere that he found. Long story short, he was able to slip out, get into and start the car, and he was off to the races. Disappeared for 2 days, had to put out a silver alert. Was found by the police in his vehicle, out of gas, hungry, bewildered, on side of road 3 states away. Sold the car quick after that! We were blessed with a good outcome, not everyone is.

Don't let this, or worse, happen to your family or to an innocent party that might be injured or killed by someone who has no business driving. If getting rid of the car isn't an option, listen to the poster who mentioned a kill switch. You have to take matters into your own hands. It's really frustrating, and my heart goes out to you. I have been here, and still have to revisit. At this point, I am able to just tell him "You don't drive anymore", and he just nods and accepts it. It took a while to get here. Stay strong. Good luck.

We're in TN. When we called we were told that we (the family) could not force him to give up his license. We were told we could fill out a form that would require him to be tested but that our name, address etc had to be on the form. Thankfully Pop voluntarily surrendered his license after a fender bender, but, even then, the Neuro doc had to write a letter for him stating that he could never drive again. With that letter and his voluntary surrender we were able to get him an ID that never expires.

You might contact his auto insurance agent and they could give you direction. They don't want to insure a "risk" and let them be the bad guy... they might write a letter requesting a doctor's report on driving ability... and go from there.

This was an ongoing battle with my dad. In December 2017, the doctor submitted the paperwork to the DMV and the DMV sent a letter telling him his license was suspended. Our care manager took him to the DMV for an ID card but the DMV did not make him surrender his drivers license. Big mistake. In April of 2018, I tried a 'mini-intervention' to get the keys from him (he keeps them zipped in his pocket 24/7). This resulted in the police coming because he became violent, handcuffs, and 5 day stay in the hospital labeled as a combative patient. I sure don't want to do that again! I tried having the police help me but they said there was nothing they could do unless they catch him. I even went so far as to have people calling me at work to let me know where they saw him, I in turn called the sheriff, and yet they did nothing. It was not until the sheriff paid him a visit at his house and took the hard copy of his license from him that he finally quit driving. In his mind, because he still had the hard copy of his license, he still 'had a license' and could drive. He has not driven since except he drives back and forth in his driveway sometimes, still digging his heels in that he thinks he is a safer drive than everyone else (he isn't). His caregivers and myself drive his cars and take him wherever he needs to go. We added the caregivers to his auto insurance so he can keep it covered.

Call a lawyer

Yes your primary care doctor can do it. We had to download the form and take it to doctor to fill out and then he sent it to DPS.

1. Get a new neurologist.
2. Contact DPS yourself. If you can't report him yourself, maybe they have suggestions. The report might be able to be made anonymously.
3. Primary care MD?
Of course even doing any of that, so long as he has access to keys and a car will not stop him. Both your lives could be destroyed, including financially if there is an accident he is at fault for. Then your life would be REALLY awful/miserable.
Is there a nursing/rehab/ type facility that can test an older adults driving skills and reaction time? Maybe in that way you can say fine, if you pass the test, which he is bound to fail.

Drivers with dementia is a growing problem. You can report him to the department of motor vehicles yourself and he does not need to know about it. You also can call your car insurance company and inform them of his diagnoses. The insurance company will determine whether or not they cover him as a driver. Your home life already is strained and keeping him and those around him safe from his driving is, unfortunately, your burden.

You also may be able to ask a family member or friend to stay with him while you go in person to report him as a potentially dangerous driver at the DMV and meet with your insurance agent to make sure that, if he does drive and cause an accident, he will be covered and the two of you will not risk losing everything because of a personal injury or wrongful death lawsuit.

Contact your insurance carrier. There are independent companies that will do a driving assessment and give you and your insurance carrier the results. These professionals will assist you with "the talk" when you take the keys away. Most neurologists will also assess and write a statement that he is no longer able to safely operate a motor vehicle on public streets and tell their patient that they have written a RX to stop driving. I gained financial power of attorney for my spouse and just sold his car to my granddaughter while he was in rehab for 9 months. I keep my car keys out of his reach. I tell him I'll drive you when you need to go somewhere, you don't have to worry about driving. He still insists he can drive - 2 years later - but I always just say "don't worry, I'll give you a lift". When he gets angry and says "you sold my car!" I just reply "you have a chaufer, why do you want the upkeep of another car?" Give him Uber and Lyft or local handicapped ride service coupons.

My FIL had gotten to the point that he was so weak and slow it took him three minutes to get from one end to the other of our modest 3BR home. He had macular degeneration and had additional patches where his vision was lost. He did not have ALZ, but his short term memory and ability to reason or make decisions were not what they once had been. We suspected vascular dementia, but found out later that at some point he had had a stroke. He was confused by things like thermostats and TV remotes. No matter how many times we showed him how the doors worked he told others that he was locked in. Every morning he had oatmeal, a scrambled egg, mandarin orange slices and soft bread with butter and jelly, coffee and juice. He told others that he always had oatmeal and he thought we made it the day before and reheated it. So.. between the extreme weakness and vision loss and cognitive losses he did not need to be driving. Yet, his eye doctor said he could see well enough to drive. And his daughter who lived several hours away refused to see that it was an issue and kept talking to him about getting his license renewed. Our plan had been to let it lapse and then just keep putting off being able to get to the BMV. But no, she pushed. So we ended up talking to his primary care physician who signed the letter that went to the BMV saying that he needed to be tested. Cost of the special test was something over $400. He passed the vision test. He passed the cognitive test (day of the week, who is the president etc), but the driving test he failed. The examiner wrote three pages about all of the things that went wrong on the test. It was expensive and needlessly traumatic for him. He was very embarrassed and confused by it all. It didn't need to go that way. This was in Indiana. Best wishes.

I fully understand the problem of SOME ELDERLY PEOPLE WHO SHOULD NOT DRIVE. First of all, I think it must be determined with one hundred percent accuracy that there really is an age and medical or mental problem that makes it mandatory to stop. But, there is the second aspect. Seniors should not have a car taken away "because" this or that, i.e. "you are too old", etc. based on what their kids or others say. Then they are miserable and I don't blame them. My philosophy is very simple: Whether taking the car away is mandatory or just a sensible precaution, YOU CANNOT TAKE SOMETHING AWAY FROM SOMEONE WITHOUT PROVIDING AN ALTERNATIVE TO ACCOMPLISH THE SAME OUTCOME. For example, if the senior used the car to go on errands or to go out to eat or to activities, and now the car is gone, someone MUST be willing to provide transportation for those same purposes BEFORE the senior is forced to give up a car. It will and has destroyed some seniors - they could not handle it. I know I couldn't. My car needed repairs a few months ago and the repair place was 2 miles down the road. I pleaded in vain for someone, paid to do so, to take me 2 miles. Not a single soul was willing so I knew I had no choice but to walk across a big school field and go to the main road and hitch hike. And I will be 86. I was forced to do this some time ago and it was horrible, very frightening with an uncertain outcome - but I had no other way and I had to be at a certain place, I had no options to change things. I was lucky but I really don't want to be forced to do this again. This is what I mean - someone has to be there for a senior if you take their car. It is the only humanitarian and decent thing to do - and it may help the senior give the car up more easily. Remember, it could be YOU who needs a ride. Then what?