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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I acknowledge and authorize
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I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Elsabee, I am so sorry you lost your husband. How long were you married? It is going to take some time to heal. I don't think there is any best way to find yourself again. You never really lost yourself. Your direction just changed to taking care of your husband. I think it is totally okay to spend some time just being yourself and breathing. Do the things that bring you some contentment. Allow yourself to feel bad. Let your friends and family know you still care about them and share time together. In time you'll see new opportunities of roads to travel and realize there is a lot of happiness left for you. We probably each have to find our own way out of the grief. It is a sad thing about being human. Grief can be a huge consequence of loving someone.
Elsa, I am so sorry for your loss. Finding yourself will take awhile, a day at a time. Find a grief support group, many churches have them. Getting together with people also going through grief will be a good start. You will find things you have in common, perhaps meet for a cup of coffee or lunch. Does your local library have a book club? What do you like to do? Swim? Hike? Or just go for a walk? Cook, play cards? There are many informal groups that do all sorts of things together. Google "meetups" you will find groups in your area that share some of the interests that you have. Sewing? Knitting? Line dancing? Opera? Ballet? Even birdwatching. Take your time and take care of you.
Elsabee, that is a long time. So much of your life has been together that it may take a while. Do you belong to a church? That would be the place I would start, because there are groups that do things. There are activities to volunteer for that accomplish good things for the community. You are in a position that many women find themselves in late in life, since women tend to live longer than men. I have a feeling that you will find several friends who know exactly what you are going through. When you are ready, these women may help you find a new direction for your life. If you're interested, you can also join the local senior center. Many of them have so much to do. You may make fast friends with the people there. Many people are widows and widowers who have found new things they like to do.
My husband died 11 years ago after 41 years of marriage and a family business (which I am still operating). I found myself asking "Now who am I--as just me?" I found that talking with friends and relatives who were also widowed was very helpful (I sometimes say that one thing I can do is hug widows). Also found that it was good to spend time with my own family--especially ones that I had grown up with. Old friends--people I had gone to high school and college with before I met my husband--were good company. I have gotten involved in church activities that I hadn't been able to do in my husband's last few years. And sometimes I tell myself that there is nothing I can do to change the facts; just do what I can to develop gifts and abilities that I hadn't had time for earlier.
I'm sorry for your loss. Check out your local senior center or community center for activities you may enjoy. Start slow, check out other groups in your area, volunteer for your local hospital or nursing home. You will meet new people and may find new activities you really enjoy. Your husband will always be in your heart and memories, but you will find you can enjoy life again. Go forth and have fun.
That's a very long time to be married. I can't imagine how life changing this loss is. I would be patient with myself. There are so many feelings you must have.
I know that with some of my parent's friends, they bond together when they lose their spouse. Some are neighbors and others are church friends. They call each other on the phone at least once per day. They meet for breakfast many mornings, go to the Y for walks, take day trips, go out to dinner, go shopping and just stay busy.
I know that the grief must be difficult. I would encourage you to reach out to others. Sometimes sharing with others who have gone through something similar can be helpful.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I found that talking with friends and relatives who were also widowed was very helpful (I sometimes say that one thing I can do is hug widows). Also found that it was good to spend time with my own family--especially ones that I had grown up with. Old friends--people I had gone to high school and college with before I met my husband--were good company. I have gotten involved in church activities that I hadn't been able to do in my husband's last few years. And sometimes I tell myself that there is nothing I can do to change the facts; just do what I can to develop gifts and abilities that I hadn't had time for earlier.
I know that with some of my parent's friends, they bond together when they lose their spouse. Some are neighbors and others are church friends. They call each other on the phone at least once per day. They meet for breakfast many mornings, go to the Y for walks, take day trips, go out to dinner, go shopping and just stay busy.
I know that the grief must be difficult. I would encourage you to reach out to others. Sometimes sharing with others who have gone through something similar can be helpful.