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My 89 year old Mother is becoming aggressive and mean towards me. She accuses me of not telling her things which I do. Her perception is that I'm mean to her! She creates these scenarios that make her a victim and me the terrible daughter. She is unable to listen when I try to explain the facts. I think there is more going on than just her hearing loss.

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If you suspect dementia, Google “dementia symptoms”. Websites such as Mayo clinic's and the Alzheimer Assn's will give you an idea of what to look for. If you think your mom exhibits some of these symptoms, make an appt. with her PCP. Your mom's PCP can ask some basic questions and perform a rudimentary assessment. If he/she suspect's dementia she (mom) would be referred to a neurologist or maybe a gerontologist to conduct further testing. Her PCP is not trained to diagnose the cause of dementia.
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Here is some information that can help you understand:

https://www.healthline.com/health/dementia/stages#stages

Your mother's age and based on your description it's most likely she is in the Moderate stage...

"Moderate dementia

People experiencing moderate dementia will likely need more assistance in their daily lives. It becomes harder to perform regular daily activities and self-care as dementia progresses. Common symptoms during this stage include:
- increasing confusion or poor judgment
- greater memory loss, including a loss of events in the more distant past
- needing assistance with tasks, such as getting dressed, bathing, and grooming
- significant personality and behavior changes, often caused by agitation and unfounded suspicion
- changes in sleep patterns, such as sleeping during the day and feeling restless at night"

Please contact her doctor for further guidance.
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Dear "JSNO4958,"

For starters, you could go to the teal bar at the top, right on this page, click on "Care Topics," then click on "D" and scroll down until you find "Diagnostic Criteria" and the first choice of "articles" - there's also "questions" people have asked and "discussions"

Best wishes to you and your mom!
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