away. My sister and I are at odds when the to have the memorial service. She wants it right away. I prefer to wait. Full disclosure. We have committed to hosting a wedding at our home which in no way takes precedence over the memorial. I just need time to process everything and want to be 100 percent there for my mother. I'm asking her to delay 2 months and celebrate her life in the spring. Am I wrong?
It is largely personal preference so there is no right or wrong way. Sounds like a negotiation.
My MIL died Mar 1st, her memorial wasn't till May. She was cremated and buried with her husband in a National Cemetery where we live. May was picked because it was their anniversary and her birthday. So a Memorial can be held anytime.
I would like the Spring. New life emerging. Warmer weather nicer for people.
It was really just fine. Gave us time to do a lot of cleaning and YS (who can be a pill) was not there to complain & criticize.
She got back the morning of the funeral and all went well.
You are right to feel as you do, so is sister. Try to come together on a plan. Divisiness is not a good part of funeral planning.
My mother died at the end of July, and we had to wait a month until her service because everyone in her church decided to die then, too, and the calendar was booked. Honestly, I felt like I was in limbo until we could have the service, and I hated that feeling. We had to wait two weeks to do my dad's service, which was bad enough (he died the day before Thanksgiving), but it was what it was.
Dragging out the closure phase of a death is very painful for some people. Try to have some compassion for your sister's feelings, and frankly, a memorial service takes very little effort to set up in comparison to a wedding. You could have the entire thing put together in a few days.
Your sister rightly feels that an inconvenient scheduling conflict isn't a good reason to postpone a memorial.