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The problem I have is that no one told him this family member had died. However, my dad asked me about it and even knew how she had died, which was not normal circumstances.


How did he know about her death?


Has anyone had this happen to them before?

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How weird. Someone must have told him, but if he grasped that it happened, he was owed tge compassionate affirmation you gave him.

If he doesn’t retain the info at your next visit, there is no reason to make him relive it.
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Rose1940 Mar 2022
Hello no one told him and he was ok after I told him that she was at peace, he hasn’t asked about her again.
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Ask all your relatives to see who told him. If no one did, then it was the dead relative or someone from the other side who came to tell him. No other explanation possible.

As for things like this happened before. Oh yes, documented and written in many life after death books.
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Rose1940 Mar 2022
Hello thank you for responding, no one told him, there are only our immediate family who visit him, my brother, sister and mother were the only ones who had visited him from the time the relative died to him asking me.
he has no access to social media or overseas newspapers to have read it, he doesn’t watch tv, but it wasn’t on any news report here in Australia.
her death was very sudden so it’s not like he knew she was sick.
he was very concerned when he was asking me, I calmed him down and told him she was at peace and he seemed to be ok with my response.
he hasn’t mentioned her since but he has been a bit different since then, he is not sure where he is, he doesn’t know why he’s there and he is asking us if he can leave. In the year and a half that he’s been in the nursing home he has never asked to leave and has always been comfortable and at ease where he is.
it is becoming a bit harder because we just don’t know what to say to him.
I agree with a previous comment that someone posted, this disease sucks.
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Someone told him. Did you ask him who it was?

Sorry, I don't believe in people talking to someone from the other side, so find out who told him.
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Beliefs have nothing to do with the truth which exists independent of anyone's belief or disbelief.
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MJ1929 Mar 2022
😄😄
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Social Media
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Rose1940 Mar 2022
No social media access.
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Did he have access to a newspaper (I think they're still published!) If so, it might have been in an obituary column. Same thing could happen if he has access to the Internet.
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Rose1940 Mar 2022
No access to internet, social media and he can’t get hold of overseas paper.
he hasn’t mentioned it since so we are just leaving it there.
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Rose,
Sorry for your loss of a family member. 🌹

Were you close to the person who passed?
Do you feel it was your responsibility to tell your Dad?
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Rose1940 Mar 2022
Thank you, she was my first cousin, we have the same name, we are named after our grandmother. My dads mother. I had never meet her, she lived overseas but we talked through Facebook.
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If he has dementia himself, there’s no reason to assume that he knew anything but what his injured brain was telling him.

Patients with dementia often discuss topics based on their own facts, and will become annoyed if

As long as he was not distressed about the conversation, this may have been a coincidence.
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Lucky guess. Much of what is said is nonsense. This just happened to be true. If you say things often enough and with enough variety eventually one of them will be correct. Magical thinking is fun, but it's just that. Magical thinking. IMHO.
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Katefalc Mar 2022
My husband is insisting to everyone he sees that I have died and everyone on his picture board is dead. We are ALL alive. He does not recognize me and asked me today who I was and how did we meet. It’s absolutely heartbreaking to see him this way. He was my high school sweetheart and we got married at 20. We are both 72 1/2 and he thinks we are in our 20’s. This disease SUCKS big time. I’m SO very sad and I miss him so much. He’s not the same guy I married but I love him so much.
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Many many things happen that defy explanation; that have no 'logical' explanation to them yet do not fall within the parameters of 'magical thinking'. Magical thinking suggests insanity or something equivalent of unicorns. People who have had near death experiences and write in detail about their experiences wouldn't appreciate being called 'insane' or laughed at. There is much to learn from such people, as all of us are teachers with something to offer others in the way of learning.

Why do people believe in 'magical' gods & mythical creatures they pray to, without evidence such beings even exist? People read & quote books called 'bibles' that were written by men, yet insist such men were 'divinely inspired' to write the words contained therein. Churches, temples & mosques are built with gold & riches to praise God or Allah, when such beings may be nothing more than figments of man's imagination. Yet try to tell THAT to the same people who laugh and poke fun at those who try to explain that life after death DOES exist (which is also written about in the bible, btw) or that deceased loved ones DO speak to us! They'll tear your head off and show their sharp teeth if you dare tell them the 'bible' is just a bunch of nonsense! THAT is sacrilege, but what we're saying is 'magical thinking and nonsense.' Atheists are entitled to deny the existence of God or a higher power, yet those who believe in the afterlife & the ability to speak to dead loved ones are not entitled to embrace THAT belief. A double standard, to say the least.

Truth is, there are a great many truths to behold in this enormous universe, most of which we're fully unaware of! To keep an open mind is to enjoy a lot more beauty and wonder in life than those who choose to keep a closed mind and function inside of a vacuum. There is no air in a vacuum, and all who try to live within it suffocate.

So, to the OP: Nobody can tell you precisely where or how your dad knew about your family member's death, but somehow he did. Did you ask him how he knew? If someone had told him, and if so, who? What did he say? If he told you that nobody told him, that he just somehow 'knew', then you'll have to chalk it all off to this deceased relative TELLING him via a dream, or a visitation, what had happened. One time, while on vacation in Hawaii many years ago, I woke up with my heart racing. I KNEW I had to call home & talk to my father. I did, and I asked him if he was okay? He said he hadn't been feeling well, but how did I know? I told him "I don't know dad, I just KNEW." And I can't tell YOU, either, how I knew, just that I DID. Maybe that's what happened with your dad, too. He 'just knew'.

Miracles only exist when we believe they do, that is my philosophy on life!
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Rose1940 Mar 2022
I agree with your comment
“Miracles only exist when we believe they do, that is my philosophy on life!”
I didn’t ask him who told him, because I was in such a shock that he was telling me about her and her death, he also said that she didn’t have family close, which was true most of her family are estranged from her. I was trying to comprehend what he had just told me, I should have asked him who told him. I managed to calm him down and he hasn’t mentioned it to any of our family since.
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“Those who believe in the afterlife & the ability to speak to dead loved ones are not entitled to embrace THAT belief”. Freedom of religion means that people can believe what they wish to believe, including ‘Turtles All The Way Down’. ‘Embracing’ any belief is an ‘entitlement’ we all share in a democracy, whether or not it’s true. Rejecting a belief is a similar ‘entitlement’.
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Perhaps he had a dream or a vision. It’s not that unusual.
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