He is 85, I am 72. He has severe pain in right hip which has worsened and he takes pain meds with evening meds. He just started asking for the meds during day. He can take 4 times a day. He has started waking me nearly every two hours at night asking if it’s time to get up or just talking about anything that pops in his head. I can’t sleep with the questions and the pats the abrupt questions and my fear that he will get up and fall or pass in his sleep.
suggestions?
Are you happy with your current medical advisors? Who is leading his health care?
Is he's asking for pain meds earlier and earlier he may be addicted, as was my 80+ MIL when prescribed hydrocodone for her back pain. Overall I think you need to have his doctor make sure that his cocktail of meds is not what is making him seem "senile"...perhaps the dosages and times need to be adjusted.
When facilities have residents who are fall risks they put the mattress right on the floor. You can try a bed rail or a hospital-style bed that can be lowered but not sure this will work for his hip pain.
You have your hands full and it is very important that you take care of yourself !
I hope you are getting some help with caring for him cuz it sounds like you are burning the candle at both ends.
Sorry that you are feeling so much fear. It might be helpful for you to come to terms with and accept the fact that he might fall or pass in his sleep. No matter what you try to do from preventing it from happening. As long as you are providing a safe environment, you will have nothing to feel guilty about it/when it happens.
As far as passing in his sleep, wouldn't that be a lovely, peaceful way to go? I guess it could be a little disturbing to wake up in bed with someone who has passed but it beyond that it's the method I hope for for myself. When I'm 100!