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He already has given her $50,000. Now he has been diagnosed with Dementia and I have taken over control of finances. He pleads with me daily to let him give her another $50,000 because she is desperate. She told him that and showed him a photo of her horrible apartment. We have not seen the actual apartment. Her associate told me she runs this scam on all her male patients. I am going nuts with the constant pleas. Ideas?

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If I were you, I would do a quick google search of who licenses Physical Therapists in your state, and then report her to that agency. That is a clear ethical violation, and I would imagine she could very well lose her license over it.
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BurntCaregiver Apr 13, 2024
She would lose it or it would at least be suspended for a long time and she'd pay a fortune in fines to restore it. Fines that will no doubt be paid with the OP's 50 grand.
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I’ve read your replies. Please do not discuss this PT or money with your husband again at all. Go deaf when he mentions her or finances. You’ll never convince him of anything, the dementia has made those reasoning skills impossible. And if you haven’t reported her to the state licensing board and to her employer, please do that now.
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File a police report now..
that almost happened to a friend..
Get them when they are the weakest..these croons think these patients don’t have loved ones?
Is there anyway to get this ball rolling? This person actually needs to be investigated to see how many victims there are… guaranteed there are more than one victim..
.. do you have POA!??
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Toyontoots9411 Apr 13, 2024
I used a POA to take control of all finances. And I spoke to police. Because he gave her the money, there is no getting it back. And yes, I KNOW that she had done it before. I am talking to an attorney about filing against her for Elder Abuse and Financial manipulation and/or extortion

My husband refuses to accept that she could possibly be a scam artist. He says maybe she did that in the past, but not with him. He said she told him he was like a father to her and he promised to support her like a daughter. I think that promise is stuck in his head.

I want to know how to deal with the day to day begging for money to give to her.
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There are meds for agitation. Have you talked to his doctor?

You can and should report her to the State licensing board.

It's so sad that a professional would take advantage like this.
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If no other strategy works to make him let go of this delusion:

Write a fake "thank you" note "from her" and address it to him and mail it to him (no return address). The note content thanks him for his help but now she's in a better place and doesn't need or want help anymore and that she's moved out of the country with a new wealthy boyfriend so she won't be in contact with him again. Take out this note when he wants to send her money.

He won't know what her handwriting looks like but make it look different than yours or have a friend write it.

Hopefully he doesn't use a phone or have internet access anymore and if he does it's one where you control all his incoming and outgoing calls from an app (Raz Memory phone).

Also, how is it that the other PT knows she did this to other patients but didn't report her? S/He should also be reported to the licensing board.
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I agree with everything said. Your husband is incompetent to give anyone money. She took advantage ofva man who she knew has Dementia. First thing I would have done was call her employer. As said she has a license with the State. I would have contacted them. No one in this type of work, therapists, nurses, LPNs and CNAs should be taking money or gifts from a client. And, I would make sure I was present when he has therapy.
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A PT needs be licenses in the state and needs to work at company which you can go to their supervisor. File a police report and also file a complaint with her state licensing board
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Make sure that you block her number and any digital access (FB, etc).

You must relentlessly redirect, distract or ignore your husband's pleas. He may need meds at this point so talk to his doctor.

Then make sure to report this crime -- it's a felony and there will be more victims. Maybe you'll have a chance of getting some of that money back.
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BurntCaregiver Apr 13, 2024
No, Geaton she does not have to redirect. Simply ignore him when he starts up about the woman.
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Call the police and report her for something if you can
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AlvaDeer Apr 13, 2024
Report her for elder abuse and get her license taken away.
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WANTS TO GIVE? From what you say he ALREADY DID IT.
We start with the fact your husband is now never to be in any room alone with this person. Nor should this person be seen again.

All right, this is elder abuse and elder fraud and the penalties are severe and will result in loss of licensure.
It is time to take your proof of your husband's having given money to a physical therapist to the police. File a report with your proof. Contact the licensure board in your state for physical therapists: this person may not even BE one or would know better than to do this.
Next call APS and open a case on this. Ask them to your home and be ready to show your proof.

This is "gifting" of money and will preclude your husband's getting any aid from Medicaid in the next five years (2 1/2 in California). You need police reports on it.

Now, if your husband is completely competent and wishes to give this money away that is his right and I suggest you get IMMEDIATE legal separation and division of assets. At once. On Monday, if that's the case.
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Toyontoots9411 Apr 13, 2024
I have already turned her in and taken control of all our finances. He gave her the money over several months before his Dementia diagnosis. I put a stop to that as soon as I discovered it. I am working to get her license suspended, etc. I have blocked any contact between him and the PT. I cannot get the idea of her and of his promise "to support her" out of his head. I just walk away when he brings it up. But it still hurts me and makes me very sad to see him in such a state. And I am angry at him, Can't help it, even though I know it is the "disease". I now do not trust him at all.
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