My mother claims her cat speaks to her! How do I handle this?

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My mother claims her cat speaks to her! How do I handle this?

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My 94-yr-old mom claims her cat speaks to her. He is now using complete sentences. She gets furious if I act skeptical and says I think she's just a crazy old lady. She claims that she IS NOT and that in fact she is far smarter than me. This must be the onset of dementia? Should I just go along with the talking cat phenomenon, or try to keep her from falling further down this slippery slope?

Alzheimer's & Dementia

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Not necessarily dementia. Is the cat talking new? or complete sentences new? UTIs and some medications can cause delusions. Sometimes even medications someone has been taking for a while since as the body ages our ability flush medications out of our system declines - the 10mg dose that didn't cause any problems 5 years ago may need to be reduced to 5mg now.

Definitely time to see the doctor.

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Thank you for your note. Claudia refuses to go to a doctor. She has been taking a mild dose of blood pressure meds for several years. The remarkable talking cat started out with single words about a month ago. Lately, he's progressed to sentences. He recently recited a list of nice people he loves. I was not on the list, which Claudia gladly pointed out. She now has (and it seems to have developed quickly) many delusions: all young men have a crush on her and madly want her, someone breaks into her apartment regularly and steals her Kraft cheese slices, everyone she runs into tells her "you are beautiful", and she has lost all of her money. We were always best friends, now we are just short of physical violence. I'm the only one she absolutely hates. So so difficult to be on this shifting sand.

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I get that. My mil believes her cat has talked to her for years. And he is sick all the time (he's not ). She gets really mean to him. I feel sorry for her and her cat.

When she gets angry, it is usually with me. I have read that our LOs usually take out their anger and frustration on their caregiver. :( The person that is doing the best they can to keep them safe.

I am sorry I don't have any answers for you.

Best of luck to you on this journey!

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Try your best to get her tested for a UTI. UTIs in the elderly can cause some wild, crazy hallucinations and delusions. I know places like Walmart carry home tests for UTIs, although I’ve never used one so I can’t speak for their accuracy.

Its justs seems that if your mom has made it thus far without showing signs of dementia- and then going from zero to 60 with a talking cat - that it’s more likely something physical. Dementia starts out slowly - usually - although it can progress quite quickly.

Dont try to reason with her - that seems to be making matters worst. You don’t need to feed the delusions but you can simply nod and say things like “huh, imagine that”.

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If there's nothing physically wrong with her, and if she doesn't have a UTI, just play along with her and tell her she's lucky to have such a smart cat.

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You guys are the greatest! So glad I've discovered this site. THANKS!!

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Look into Lewy Body Dementia. Hallucinations and delusions are early signs of the disease. They can appear in later stages of Alzheimer’s though you would have seen many signs if that were the case. At 94, most any infection or medication can throw an elder off her rocker. My MIL is also 94 and she has returned to baseline after treatment several times. My father with Lewy Bodies stays trapped in his bizarre delusions 24/7. Whatever the cause, your life will be much easier if you go along with it.

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I would think it's past time for a doctor's appointment,an get that evaluation...will make your life a little more easier for the both of you...it will be a good start. The best to you an mom💝

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If everything is alright physically. I see no reason not to go along with the cat talking.
My Husband and I had a dog for many years and I would "make the dog talk" and we had some very funny conversations. Even after the dog had died we would often bring up "What would Rinny have said about that" (German Shepard that we had for 16 years)
As long as what the cat is saying is not causing any anxiety I see no harm in playing along.

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You handle it with kindness and gentleness. Does your mother live alone? All the more reason for the cat to be talking with her. Loneliness truly sucks.

I imagine my animals talking to me all the time - there's no harm in it. Some "looks" just call for interpretation.

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It might be no bad thing to call in a professional opinion. If only so that you can establish beyond all doubt that this is not a case of your going round the bend.

Could be dementia, could be something more acute and more treatable, could be an exacerbation of, or a stretching of, my mother's bedtime ritual where she had an earnest goodnight "conversation" with her toy cuddly elephant. To her, harmless fun. But it set my teeth on edge - I can't tell you how wildly I detested this behaviour. Completely unreasonable on my part, I confess, but it quite turned my stomach.

But in any case, how can it hurt to check?

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LightingRod, there are some cats that have the ability to parrot words, but it takes a lot of training which needs to start when they are in the kitten stage. It's constant word association. I've trained two cats over the past 40 some years. It only works if the cat can make a variety of sounds. Only one cat could do a sentence, it was short 3 worded one, and nothing more.

So unless your Mom had spent years training the cat, that cat doesn't say words... but Mom might think the cat does, sometimes our ears can trick us. Just play along with Mom, as this isn't really hurting anything.

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Yes ....as others have said..."just go with it."

Look @ this harmless behavior to figure out what your Mom is really thinking & feeling as it seems she has decided its easier or "safer" to communicate through her cat.

You could join in .....for instance.....kitty is so tired & he wants to take a nap with you now...am pretty sure that's what he said....kitty is having lunch now & thinks you should too...etc etc. Try to have fun with it if Mom allows....it might work in your favor.

Unfortunately you as the primary CG will always be the "bad guy." Only in fleeting moments of clarity will your efforts be acknowledged & appreciated. Remember it's not really your Mom but the aging process & disease talking. She's lucky to have you.

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This obviously sounds like a delusion or hallucination. Since your profile said she’s in IL with depression...this doesn’t add up. Get her checked. If being skeptical or denying her makes her angry then just go with it and make life easy on yourself. Usually they tell people who care for patients with things like this to live inside their reality. Arguing doesn’t help at all as they can’t see reason and to them this is real

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My mother told us a large frog had appeared in her room and was talking to her and it had come up through the toilet. She also would tell us she could see family members who were not there. This was when she lived on her own and was driving, etc. The hallucinations did not appear to bother her. We figured out several years later that she had Lewy Body dementia. She also was incredibly sensitive to many medications and this would sometimes make the hallucinations worse. As she declined she hallucinated almost non-stop. It seemed to comfort her. Lewy Body is very strange in that the person can have moments of complete clarity and speak normally in between being non-verbal and not even knowing who you are. It's also very under-diagnosed, especially in older patients. Another sign is frequent falls, hand shaking and rigidness in the body as well as imposter syndrome (once when I was visiting for several hours she told me brother after I left "that was NOT my daughter"). Your mother's clarity around the cat speaking seems a bit out of the ordinary. I would have her checked.

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I love it. Made my day. Not trying to trivialize. My cat often looks at me as if he's secretly plotting.

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My sister's cat (no dementia at all) communicated clearly to my sis until the cat's death, but only thru' a pet psychic. :) The cat's vocabulary was VERY sophisticated, too! I was impressed. I teach at the university level, and some of my students aren't as articulate as the cat. Maybe your mom has developed psychic abilities? And I LOVE Lucy in the sky's suggestion of letting her know what the cat is saying to you! I do love this site.

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My mother who has dementia talks to her pussycat all the time the only problem is we don't have a pussycat but it seems to keep her company so I just ignore it but before I ignored this I made sure that she didn't have a urinary tract infection and was not having a reaction to this little bit of medication she takes. So my advice is try to get her to the doctor and if everything turns out okay then consider yourself lucky that she found a friend you got to have a sense of humor lol

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If it is dementia, then this is her reality. No use trying to convince her otherwise unless the cat starts telling her to make monetary or health decisions that are unwise. Otherwise, you might try complimenting the cat once in a while just to gain mom's confidence. I know it sounds silly, but accept this is her reality.

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My Mom was diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia. She continues to hallucinate about a cat that comes to her room to visit. She also sees and converses with long dead people. She also has delusions and paranoid thoughts most of the time. At times she is cognizant and in reality and at other times she is really in another dimension. It is an ever changing and confusing disease..........

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I’m the sort of person who says “bless you” to my animals when they sneeze. And I have a Maine Coon cat who says “oh, Ma!” when he wants to eat. And like Claudia, my mom’s delusions were in high gear. I couldn’t keep track of all them, but also like Claudia, she was desirable, at the age of 92, to all men. Funny part was, she loathed and feared men.

I agree with not arguing with her. However, monitor what the cat says. If it starts telling her to harm others or herself, it’s time for the doctor for Claudia, like it or not.

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First of all, what medications is she taking? Many of them for an elder can manifest into hallucinogenic thoughts, e.g. such as "cat talking, seeing objects that aren't there, etc." Speak with her geriatric physician.

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Tell her she is lucky to have that ability.
Explain that you do not have it. So could she translate to you what the cat says.

That way you will have an insight and a 'heads up' into her mind.

As long as she harms no-one and keeps herself safe, she is doing no harm, I think.
Get her a little treat for her and for the cat, as a "sorry I did not accept the fact you can talk WITH your cat"

Good luck

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Go with the flow - however monitor how you are speaking with your mom - we can fall into a tendency of not tell thing bad news etc but also to talk at them not with them - she may just want to talk about things other than 'did you finish your juice yet?' or ' did you have a bowel movement today?' or similar - maybe she just likes conversation for its own sake & kitty helps her do that

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In some sense animals do try to communicate with humans. The tones and types of their meows or barks, hisses or growls, change depending on their needs. I think people can learn what their animals are trying to express (such as a dog barking at the door).

And who knows? Maybe your mother does have the ability to interpret what her cat is trying to convey. There's a lot that we humans still have to learn about interspecies interaction . Think, for example, about people who get too close to wild animals and fail to interpret the anger signs - warning signs for the human invaders to stay away.

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'Deed they do, Garden; and what's more, humans are a lot better at understanding animals' tone of voice than they realise they are. They did one of those vox pop type surveys, playing people sound recordings of dogs and asking them to say what they thought was happening - whether the sound was a warning, excitement, anxiety or what have you - then showing the audience what had actually happened. The humans got it right impressively often.

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Hi LightingRod. You are so very Blessed to have Your beautiful Mother live to 94 years and in near perfect health up until now. UTI's can cause delusions, and I found when Caring for my own Mother R I P, that sleeping tablets caused this to happen also hence I stopped giving Mom a sleeping tablet after discussing this
with Her Doctor and there was no more delusions. I would advise
not to diagnose or analyse Your Mom but just go with it but certainly ask for a Doctors advice.

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CM, interesting. I wonder if we could learn to communicate with animals by mimicking their sounds. I recall that a certain tone of "meow" would bring the neighbors' cats closer to my house. After a while though, they just ignored me. Maybe they expected a reward for their efforts. Maybe a mouse or two?

There was an interesting program on one of the PBS channels about people who communicate through a form of chirping, and whistling. I found this interesting article:

http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20170525-the-people-who-speak-in-whistles

It's quite lovely and soothing to hear.

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As long as she's healthy (no UTI, etc.) then let her believe the cat is talking. You can ask her what they talked about today, etc. She might like sharing this with you. :-)

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Hi Lightingrod,
While I don't have any experience with dementia, I have lots with cats. And the way I see it is, in choose talking to my cat over most of the people I know.....So much for the *superior species*.😉

If at 94 Mom wants to conversate with the cat, hey she's earned it....

Seriously tho, it sounds like Claudia is talking through the furball. Pay attention......remember the old saying...."I have this friend....."

Keep a sense of humor, check for a UTI and good luck to you both!

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My mother claims her cat speaks to her! How do I handle this?

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