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My mother is 83 and coughs a lot at night. Is she anxious about dying?

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First you make the adamant statement that she IS afraid of dying.

Then you say she coughs a lot at night.;

What, pray tell, has coughing a lot at night have to do with fear of dying, and why would this come into your head?
I would consider that it is perhaps YOU who are afraid, if she has not expressed such a fear.

Now onto the coughing a lot.
Can you ascertain any reasons for this yourself?
Have you any ideas?
Sometimes when a senior has trouble laying flat without a cough or without some shortness of breath it indicates that there may be some Congestive Heart Failure going on. Or there may be some underlying lung problems such as COPD.

I would have your mother see a doctor and report her symptoms.
I think fear of dying has little to nothing to do with this unless you are not telling us something crucial to this question.

I wish you and mom the very best.
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I'd venture to guess that 95% of human beings are afraid to die. What does coughing at night have to do with fear of dying, I don't get it? Get her to the doctor to see what medical condition is causing her coughing at night, and then pick up a few books about near death experiences to calm moms fears a bit about dying. Proof of Life by Dr Eben Alexander is a very good one, available on Amazon.

In the meanwhile, prop her head up with extra pillows and see if that helps.

Good luck.
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Maybe try elevating the head of the bed slightly, you can put a bolster under the mattress or blocks under the legs of the bed.
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