We found about about this last year, when we obtained a POA. could not understand why they had no money ( my dad has severe dementia) and she confessed to sending him over 1000.00 a month.
To keep the peace, we agreed to send him 500.00 a month( now documented)
I am concerned what will happen when she files for medicaid.
Right now, its fine because my father has a decent pension, but when he passes, her income will require her to need state assistance,
I dont want to get into trouble for sending these checks to him( from her accounts)
https://www.elderlawanswers.com/529-plan-assets-can-collide-with-medicaid-eligibility-2299
Your role as POA makes you responsible for disbursing substantial amounts of her money to your brother. It wasn't clear from your question whether your brother is living with your parents. Future Medicaid eligibility will at minimum be complicated by the payments you describe, and at worst could be found to be disqualifying transfers that you are responsible for.
Your role as POA makes you responsible for disbursing substantial amounts of her money to your brother. It wasn't clear from your question whether your brother is living with your parents. Future Medicaid eligibility will at minimum be complicated by the payments you describe, and at worst could be found to be disqualifying transfers that you are responsible for.
It may be stretching the truth a bit -
but would leecher... er... son be in any position to know different? While you’re stretching the truth you might even say that they will garnish his paycheck if leecher ... er ... son has a job. Tell him you’ve consulted an attorney.
Since your mother wont or cant recognize the seriousness of the situation - maybe try going at it from a different angle. While it’s probably a looooong shot just maybe sonny can be made to see the seriousness of this all and even if your mother continues to send money he will not cash the check(s).
We are making an appointment with an Elder lawyer for her, and he can't explain it to her. Leech-son is not speaking to us since we found out.
explain to her that yes it is her money...but getting welfare (Medicaid is welfare) from the taxpayers is based only on the person being unable to pay for themselves....not because they gave their money away, but based on an honest need.
tell her to leave it to him in her will...but, she may need that money some day and he had better be prepared to pay it back or bring her to live at his house for 5 years.
She absolutely refuses to stop sending the Money.She told me its her Money, she can do as she wishes with it.
We are going to an attorney, because I am concerned because my name is all over this. Can we resolved a POA? Would the government step in to evaluate her ability to make decisions?
They have very little saved, but she is going to need it when he passes.
has anyone had this awful experience?
Sick and disgusted that she is being pray don by her own son.
I agree, go the attorney, lay it out, see what can be done. My brother and I just took away his step mother's credit cards, debit cards and now are going for guardianship due to her dementia and having a felon for a son, who keeps tapping her for money. Her husband is in agreement, he wants us to do this, he is 90 and in very poor health, so he knows that his days are numbered. We have their POA's but we need more.
My father helped a grandchild out with college. At the time he lived on his own and his SS covered his living expenses. He also had a very healthy bank balance so helping with college only put a small dent in that. Then he had surgery and went downhill fast. He wanted to go to AL. So he went from $1000 a month in rent to $4500 a month in rent. Then he needed 'additional help'. That brought the monthly bill up to $7000 a month. No one could have imagined that prior to him going into AL. We were ignorant about the whole system. That healthy balance is getting depleted very fast and I worry he won't make the 5 year look back. That gifted money was spent and is not going to get returned.
Yes there should be a basic class on Medicaid when one retires.
You better check to make sure Mom is survivor on Dads pension. Is so, she probably will only get 50% or less of it. Also, less SS.
There really should be a basic class on Medicaid when we retire.
Sonnys free ride and moms open wallet both need to stop - like yesterday!