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My Mother was just diagnosed with congestive heart failure. I am thinking about quitting my job and moving in with her to take care of her.

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Are you 62 or is your mom? Just reading your bio. Sometimes the posters age shows up as their loved ones age. Not sure how that happens.

I ask because your age as a worker earning a salary that allows you to continue paying into SS is very important for your future.

The compensation for paying you as a caretaker from the government is slim to none. You can apply. Contact your Area Agency on Aging and see what services are available for you both.

If the elder can’t afford to pay you a living wage for your services, then you Need to keep working.

If she needs help with finances, she is better off seeking gov help.

CHF is a manageable disorder. My mother had CHF from 90 to 97. She managed her own health care.

She weighed every morning and recorded her weight. She had HH to set up her meds and oversee her weight in order to contact her dr if she required a change in her meds. She monitored her diet to eliminate salt and vit k as she took Coumadin (warfarin) blood thinner. She made sure she exercised and kept hydrated.
I know it may seem daunting to you and your mom to hear this diagnosis. Your mom may have other health issues that complicate her health beyond the CHF. But overall, CHF, on its on, requires primarily a change in diet was my experience.
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Here's a helpful article from the home page of this website:

https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-get-paid-for-being-a-caregiver-135476.htm
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A diagnosis of CHF doesn't mean that she needs 24/7 care.

She needs to modify her diet and learn to put her feet up for a while every few hours.

It is never a good idea to give up your entire life to take on a family members care. You lose so very much that can never be regained.

Also, any public assistance program is not going to pay for her care with only CHF as the diagnosis. They would also not pay for very many hours weekly, nor do they pay anything but minimum wage.

My dad has been living with CHF, diagnosed, for 10 years, the last 3 he has been very active and traveling by himself. Make sure that you guys are not reacting out of fear of this scary diagnosis. It is manageable and often times doesn't really impact the activity level of the patient.

If I was you, I would do some research on living with CHF and help educate mom on how to get the best out of her life and not role over and place all of her life on your shoulders. If she is only 62, you could be living with her for 30 years or more.
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There's no program that will pay you for caregiving. Your mother would have to pay you. The government doesn't pay family or friends for that.

Don't quit your job. Unless you have retirement set up or a large nest egg, eventually you'll need to go back to work-- if she needs placement or when she passes away. It's rough to go back into the work force when your friends are retiring, and it's a sad fact that older people don't get hired as much as younger ones. Will you be able to pick up where you left off in 5, 10, 15 years?

Would you also be giving up a 401k or any other benefits? If you have insurance through your employer, how do you plan to get insurance for yourself?

Would you mother be able to pay you what you are earning now?

If you still take her in, are you ready to toss your entire schedule and routine out the window for her? Because your time will revolve around her. Which sounds nice at first, but it doesn't take long to wear anyone down. If she gets to where she can't be left alone, do you have a plan or person in place to be with her? Are you able to handle all her finances?

If she gets dementia later on, can you handle all the problems that come with it?

If she becomes incontinent, are you okay with cleaning up pee or poop most every day? Are you physically able to lift her or give her baths?

It's a lot of questions, I know. But these are things potential caretakers don't always think about before it's too late.
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worriedinCali Jul 2020
The government actually DOES pay family and friends to be caregivers in almost every state. Every state has at least one program for this, usually through Medicaid.
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Keep your job. There is no reason that you need to be with Mom 24/7. She needs to do as much as she can for herself. CHF is the weakening of the heart muscle. I think reading up on it may help you understand what is involved.

In an effort to prevent further heart damage:

Stop smoking or chewing tobacco.
Reach and maintain your healthy weight.
Control high blood pressure, cholesterol levels, and diabetes.
Exercise regularly.
Do not drink alcohol. 

This seems to be a good article.

https://www.healthline.com/health/congestive-heart-failure#causes-and-risks

How your Mom progresses is all up to her. Doing for her will only hinder her.
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You may be able to hear me clear across the Atlantic without any need for the internet:

DON'T!!!!!!!

Do not quit your job.

If your mother was only just diagnosed, you should have time in hand. Spend some of it on this forum, and some informing yourself about your mother's long-term prognosis, and get your bearings properly before you make any major decisions.
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Do not quit your job. Every state has at least one caregiver program that will pay a family caregiver BUT pay is almost always minimum wage and NOT FULL TIME HOURS. There are no benefits either. It would be foolish to quit your job.
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CHF isn't necessarily a terminal D/X.  My father lived 18.5 years after his DCF D/X.

What you need to do instead of planning to move in and get paid is RESEARCH CHF, and Ejection Fraction.   Learn all you can, research the meds she's been prescribed, plan for walks or home exercise, and create counteractive regimens, with the help of a good cardiologist, not one who wants to control everything (like the first one we had).  

BTW, Amiodarone has been scripted for CHF; it can affect taste, and potentially appetite.
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I understand you are living in Alamosa, Co. I would contact the Human Services Dept. 719-589-2581. They will be able to provide you with more information about Foster Care Program in your area. Depending on your area caregiver pay can range from $ 1,500-$ 2,500 depending on the extent of care. Most states has such a program, you need to do some research. A diagnosis of CHF only might not be covered, It is an early diagnosis. Medicaid has strict rules, call and find out if your mother is a candidate for such a program. Do not quit your job until you have all the facts, resources and then you can make an intelligent decision. Caregiving is not easy, it can be emotionally and physically draining at times. You will not have your own life, your loved ones needs will come first. You need to think of these things. I quit my job twenty years ago to care for my mom and have no regrets. Everyone's situation is different, though. You have to consider finances, ability to care for your mother alone, relationship, help if you get sick, retirement and so on. This is a decision only you can make. Wishing you the best in your decision. Blessings to both you and your mom.
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My family member tried to care for her aunt, who had congestive heart failure. Medicaid said they would NOT pay her.
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