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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Do you today with medicine that says no alcohol give them a little from time to time? Wondering if anyone has received advice that it is ok once a week or so to give in so the parent won't be abusive?
My dad has dementia and is an alcoholic. His stems from beer. I have come up with a way that he gets his beer but not the alcohol and it has been working perfectly. I have a couple of empty beer cans of his brand of beer that he drinks and I pour Odouls non alcoholic beer into his empty cans and give it to him. He does not know the difference because he is drinking beer out of his can that he is accustomed to. He is non aware that it is non alcoholic. Been doing this for over a week and has been working out perfectly.
Do they live with you?or are they able to care for themselves? It is okay to do so..As my Grandmother had Cancer and at their age it helps with the pains.it's okay.
Talk to your doctor and/or the pharmacist. But, if they are really an alcoholic giving then any alcohol is probably a mistake. If you are taking care of this person yourself I would advise sending them to a nursing home. Let them dry out there and then, maybe they can move to assisted living from there. Why destroy your life trying to take care of them? It is not worth it. Even if they are your parent. There are excellent dementia specialty care units in our area. Check the ones out in your area. Good luck.
Yes, where is your parent living? Is he or she somewhere they can be safe (to themselves and others) when drunk? I'm probably not in the majority in my opinion on alcoholism in elderly, terminally ill people. My feeling is, if someone is already dealing with the profound losses of dementia and all the accompanying physical and emotional ailments that it brings, is that really the time to decide they have to dry out?? For what? To become a better parent, a better employee, a better spouse? Those ships have sailed. If it's necessary to limit alcohol in order for palliative medications to work, then do it. But, go cold turkey at the end of one's life when already dealing with dementia, why? However, I certainly don't think you should have to subject yourself to your parent's alcoholism. Maybe you already suffered the impact of it during your childhood. You shouldn't invite it into your life anymore than you have to now. If it's financially possible, I'd suggest an assisted living situation. Be VERY upfront with the administrator about your parent's alcoholism - believe me, this is not an uncommon situation. Make sure they understand what they're getting into and have a plan in place for how much consumption they'll tolerate (they can't have a resident going on a total bender every night) and plan for how they and you will handle negative behaviors. You know your parent. If the plan they propose doesn't sound workable, move on to the next community. You don't want your parent's behavior in the AL to become an endless stream of phone calls and meetings for you.
I have a mother who has a traumatic brain injury and has always has major issues with alcohol. She does not drink around me,but my siblings provide it for her when they visit. It takes days for her to recover from a visit involving alcohol.
Currently my wife and I live in a beautiful retirement community. My wife has alcoholic dementia and drinks only cranberry juice. Her doctor really inforced ONLY SOFT DRINKS. There are lockers for those approved and they have locks on them. I am an alcoholic and drink only Odouls and soft drinks.
Please be aware that far too many seniors suffer with depression, particularly after tremendous losses (work/job/self worth, death of friends, spouse, loss of good health/mobility/loss of limbs and/or diminished functioning of multiple body parts, loss of independence/car keys/ability to stay in one's life-long home, etc. etc.) The depressant alcohol severely impacts one's ability to cope, one's emotional stability, as well as many other safety issues including activities of daily living. Moreover, alcolhol certainly increases the risk of further emotional, physical, and mental health damage. Consequently, it also significantly increases the risk for suicide, already at horrific levels. Extremely sad. Ask any loved one.
My mother has 2 24-hour aids in her house and said they were told she could have a glass of wine from time to time. I have seen her after two glasses of wine and no meds and it was not good. She has not had wine every day since May of this year. She just gets mad when she is told she cannot have wine so they are giving it to her so avoid confrontation.
My Mom is 91 & just moved in with me & i have been impressed with how much she drinks. This seems to be a response to problems with not sleeping & stress. Since she is not on any meds I haven't been concerned about those issues. She tries to monitor herself but does get pretty loaded occasionally. I was happy to see the replies that held a tolerant attitude. I've noticed things like mixing up words, memory problems, crabbiness, etc. that seem more relavent to drinking or some form of dementia. My husband died of a brain tumor so I have insight as to the rocky road ahead & am looking for support for myself.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
It is okay to do so..As my Grandmother had Cancer and at their age it helps
with the pains.it's okay.
However, I certainly don't think you should have to subject yourself to your parent's alcoholism. Maybe you already suffered the impact of it during your childhood. You shouldn't invite it into your life anymore than you have to now.
If it's financially possible, I'd suggest an assisted living situation. Be VERY upfront with the administrator about your parent's alcoholism - believe me, this is not an uncommon situation. Make sure they understand what they're getting into and have a plan in place for how much consumption they'll tolerate (they can't have a resident going on a total bender every night) and plan for how they and you will handle negative behaviors. You know your parent. If the plan they propose doesn't sound workable, move on to the next community. You don't want your parent's behavior in the AL to become an endless stream of phone calls and meetings for you.
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