My mother who is in LTC facility needs help when going to bathroom. The nurse stated it was sad to call on her when there are family members visiting that can assist her. My mother is in a wheelchair, and she does pull up on the grab bars in the facility, however if she falls during our visit who will be the one who is responsible for her falling?
Ann
I think the person who described this as an a la cart AL or an IL with services for hire got it right.
Check your contract and see what it says. Please update us.
I have never heard of a facility where staff (RN, CNA or other) are paid per task. Staff are usually paid for shifts worked over a week/fortnight. I do not understand your saving money comments.
I don’t think the nurse was trying to make anyone feel bad, it was just a comment on the sign of the times and I think she’s right. If everyone was willing to care for their loved ones there would be no nursing homes, LTC, ALF, etc.
now I know that’s “big wishful picture thinking”, not everyone can, or is willing, and that’s the real reality, so don’t y’all come down on me - i was a caregiver for seven years for an elderly couple with dementia, arthritis, bad heart, and Lewy dementia Parkinson’s, and I have the broken body to show for it, so I can talk. I’m just sayin’…..
You ask “who will be the one who is responsible for her falling” if you help her. Old people fall very frequently, and unless there is very obvious negligence, 'responsibility' is not a big issue. Why are you worried about being ‘responsible’? Is this about financial liability? Or what?
On the other end of the issue, it reminds me of what I experienced when my husband was in the hospital. He has Parkinson's and "most" of the time he can not even get out of a chair without some assistance. I was sleeping very near his bed and the rails were up. I woke up thinking a nurse had come in the room and realized my husband was standing on the other side of the bed in the dark. He was confused and resisted me trying to help him back to bed. I pushed the call button and asked for assistance getting my husband back into bed. The nurse came in and began fussing at me because I wasn't suppose to get him out of bed by myself. I told her he had gotten up by himself and I don't think she ever believed me.
I would mention this to the admins and I would tell them what occurred and tell them that if their aide continues to suggest this, some well-meaning but inept family member may injure themselves attempting such a thing, resulting in a suit for the facility.
A good response if someone is asked to do this is "Sorry, we don't feel safe attempting this".
I have however assisted various family members IF I felt it was safe for both if us (two were 95% independant) the other was my Mother & I knew her capabilities very well.
When another relative wanted the toilet in ER I was undecided. The staff were so busy I thought I'd help & only minimal assistance would be needed. Wrong. I attempted to assist but what was usually a 100% independant transfer became a 'you do it' moment. So I fetched staff. I got snotty RN who had similar attitide to what the OP had - layed on the guilt. Inappropriate. So I excused myself, pulled the curtain & waited outside it. It then took 2 staff & a commode. They decided on a hoist after that!
I learnt to definately err on the side of safety.
If the person is 'min assist' maybe. If not. No.
" helping someone" in a wheelchair whether it's toilet or other needs.
Definitely call the facility staff to assist her ! This is for her safety ,well being and your or family members safety. ( People can injure themselves and patient trying to help them). Pay NO attention to any of the " comments" from such facility staff; don't even reply to them, simply walk out of room while they DO THEIR JOB, You can also if you like, speak with facility administration about said employees comment; the employee is not paid to defer duties to family.
Facilities are being paid huge amounts of money to provide care, nuff said.
There is NO way I'd do it for an acquaintance I was visiting. How ridiculous the nurse suggested you do it. Even though the lady is in a different facility I'd still let the director know about it. Even better if you know her name or can give a physical description and the day she was working.
Last time I was there, she needed her depends changed. The CNA came in and acted completely put out. Asked me why I hadn't 'seen to it'. Well, I am not family and I actually barely know this woman and felt that changing her was completely not my job.
The CNA grumpily called in someone to help her and manhandled this poor woman into a fresh depends. She didn't close the door, so I got up and stood in the doorway to give the patient some privacy. She was bare bottomed for too long as the aides fussed about which depends to use. I was embarassed and angry at the same time. They were rough with the patient and she kept saying "Ow, you are hurting me!" She is only 4 weeks out from a hip replacement that she had to have done when she fell out of her wheelchair at this facility.
I didn't say anything to her family--not knowing what to say--and the next Sunday in church it was announced that she had moved to a different care center. I was really glad to hear that. Evidently what I witnessed was not uncommon.
Or the person with no training tries to transfer her and hurts themselves?
The facility is responsible for her care and her safety.
Technically it is not a nurse that is going to toilet mom but a CNA or other Aide.
The fact that she stated that it was “sad” to call on her for her service is laughable!
The only thing that is ‘sad’ is that you had the misfortune of having this person as your mother’s nurse.
If she doesn’t want to be of service to others and do her job she should quit. She would be replaced in a heartbeat. There are many wonderful nurses that wouldn’t hesitate to do an exemplary job.
I am so sorry that you have experienced this. Report her to her supervisor.
I find that people call CNAs Nurses. I have total respect for them, they do the Nurses dirty work but they are not medically trained. Their training covers maybe 2 or 3 months. For my DD LPN schooling took a 2 yr course and concentrated it into 13 months. She attended classes 5 days a week all day. Her RN took another 2 yrs. A Nurse with BS degree may go 4 yrs of college or 5.
In most places where my DD has worked, the scrubs are color coded. CNAs one color, LPN another and RN another. Always, badges should be visible telling you who they are.
The nurse is out of line