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Dad has been very forgetful - unsure of time of day, gets lost driving, etc.
At neurologist memory tests showed a decrease in memory etc since last visit six months ago. Wanted to know if anyone had success getting keys/car away from parent without forcibly taking them.......?? He thinks there is nothing wrong with driving...we are worried will get in accident and hurt himself, others, or both.

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When we took my moms license and keys I explained that the doctor said she couldn't drive anymore. She said he never told her. So next visit I asked the doctor if she could drive or be left alone? He said NO! I said could you write orders for that. He took out his script pad and wrote that she couldn't drive or be left alone...I used to show it to her and it helped. Made him the bad guy.

Now when I take my parents places though it is on MY schedule...
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I know in order to get my grandmother out from behind the wheel my father removed some part that has to do with the ignition.We just kept telling her we would get the car fixed and started driving her wherever she had to go. She had already had to many close calls with her driving and she did not have the right to hurt other people. Not being able to drive anymore is a big deal, it really is the start of many other things they will no longer be able to do independently.
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No his license is not valid. Check your state DMV. Once a doctor says you can't drive, your license is suspended. Borrow the car and don't bring it back. He will be very angry, might even call the cops, but that's the way it has to be. If he kills someone, they can sue all of you for not stopping him.
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My husband's geriatrician told him, gently but firmly, that she was required to report his dementia diagnosis to DMV and that his license would be revoked. Several days later we got the letter revoking his license. I fervently wish every medical professional would take this responsibility. That doesn't make it easy for the patient, but at least they know that their family is not responsible.

Of course family members have contacted the DMV when the doctor fails to. Of course we inform the insurance companies. It is absolutely critical that a person with dementia not be allowed to put the lives of others in danger.

Getting lost is the least of the problems with demented driving. There is slowed response time. There is momentary loss of memory (which pedal is the brake?) There is diminished judgment. Allowing someone with these impairments to drive is irresponsible. Yes, Dad will be angry and depressed. But you have to do what you have to do. I am so sorry.
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Great idea Texarkana. We told my dad that it was getting hard for us to even drive because of people texting and not paying attention.
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lol. we dropped the circuit breaker on aunt ednas electric range today. im going to blame gwb, he deserves all the hate mail he can get..
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When we realized it was time to take the keys away from our 80 yr old mother because of her Macular Degeneration she scoffed of course but then we asked her optometrist if he knew she was driving. He said NO she shouldn't be driving - she's blind in one eye and has no peripheral vision in the other. We took the keys but she never let us forget it. I can imagine how bad it feels to have someone take away your freedom, even if you only drive to the store, doctor and gas station... still you can hop in a car and go. We felt bad about it but we kept thinking how would we feel if she hurt someone or she was hurt in an accident?
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When I took dad for his results from his Neuro, they told us he could not drive anymore, and they were going to report it. He was not even on the chart anymore We made him stop driving, but they never did report it, I know this because we got a renewal app from the state of PA 6 months later. This horrified me, I mean we knew he couldn't drive but the Expert didn;t even bother to follow up and report it? So don't count on the medical experts to report him...Do it yourself or take on your self to make him stop. My MIL had had several accidents, but no diagnosis ( it;s obvious she has some form of dementia at 89) Thank goodness someone at the DMV noticed.. said she had "trembling" and needed an on the road test. She never went back and we are very glad for this
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Or he may never get in an accident. It's tough call, but I noticed you posted that your Dad gets lost while driving, is that a regular thing or just once in a great while?.....

Why I asked is that my Dad is also 92 and he stopped driving 5 years ago because of failing eyesight. So that means I have been driving him and Mom everywhere [I'm an only child] and that has me burnt out. I even lost a great full-time job because of all the time I was taking off for all the places my parents needed to be driven. Don't want you to be in that loop unless you have other relatives who can help.
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Yes Z the thinking someone is in the house is normal. My mom will ask where is the other girl that was just here. Or she never said I had to stay up...? Who is she? You know! She get paranoid that I am trying to give her meds she doesn't need or she won't cooperate because I am being mean to her...or my favorite...I never dreamed you would treat me like this. Those kind of comments just need to roll off your back...they are not themselves...even though I do believe all the bad character traits she had have become amplified. Just tell him it is okay you fixed it so they can't get in and if they do the police will know and come help. It sounds like he need extra care...If he is living by himself or with someone who can't care for him...you need to consider other options...it sounds like it is time.
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