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I am about to start being primary hospice at home caregiver for my mom. I know the home health aides will show me how to dress and change her but I am the type who likes to learn by reading. Is there a reference or a manual or a link that anyone knows of to teach me the nuances of such intimate care? Need to avoid any humiliating or embarrassing situations if I can. I can joke with her about a lot of things at the same time, she hates being fussed over. Anyone want to share how they learned to do this? I'd be very grateful!

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You really need to be hands on for this, certain ways of holding etc. What to look for when a person is dehydrated, feet care etc. taking b/p etc. all is hands on training!
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I became the personal caregiver for my Mom 5 years ago. She was always a very private person. Now I clean her bottom, bath her from head to toe. No part is exempt from my care. The hardest part for her has been the guilt that I have to do this. It is easy for the patient to take on shame for being such "a pain in the neck". I make a big effort to always let her know that nothing is a big deal. We can do all this together and it isn't a problem, it isn't her fault, it doesn't make her less of a person. Especially when accidents happen, and they will, she needs to know it is OK. I clean it up and that's the end of it. She needs to feel secure with your movements so act with confidence. Your confidence will flow into her. Encourage her to do as much of her care as she can. My Mom brushes her own hair, teeth, washes her face. Then I brush the back of her head. I agree that hands on training is a good thing but the emotional part of caring for your Mom can only be experienced between the two of you.
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YouTube has many videos to watch. It has helped me in a few instances. Good luck.
Hugs to you.
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Your hospital has a gerontological department that can give you advice on where you can get additional training. I believe the training is important and will give you confidence.
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there are many on line courses these days: maybe the online courses have text books
When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, "Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping." To this day, especially in times of "disaster," I remember my mother's words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers - so many caring people in this world." ~ Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers Neighborhood) a mere 10 hour course
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Alzheimers organization Alz.org website has online courses for a small fee. http://www.alz.org/care/alzheimers-dementia-care-training-certification.asp
I was thinking about taking it so that it may help me later as the mil stages progress. However, I don't think their is really any books out their that will prepare us as a caregiver without the real hands on too. I think education ourselves n learning from others n hands-on should help for both the caregiver n the person you are caring for too.
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