My husband and I are completely exhausted , emotionally and physically. We are caregivers of his father and mother, both with mental health conditions (bipolar disorder, severe depression and anxiety, dementia and one of them bed bound) . We have three little children and my husband is only child. We need help , we are a young couple trying to find assistance and we are so depressed with the situation and its been seven years already. We don't know were to go and they don't qualify for Medicaid due to income, but they can't be in a nursing home because its way expensive for both.
Then you can begin the search for a place (places? they may not qualify to live together with such differing needs) to have them live.
You may be surprised to find that they will qualify for Medicaid--and while that may not give you as many options, you will not be paying for their care.
Is dad a Vet? Veterans get different different benefits.
Your children will grow to resent Gma and Gpa for all the time and energy they are taking from you. Sadly, I have seen this over and over again--people putting their elderly parents' needs in front of their children to the point the kids can't wait to move out. Little kids are energy vampires--and so are some elderly. what's really sad is when neither 'group' likes living with the other.
I know this is hard to contemplate, but above all, you need to be strong for yourselves, your kids and lastly, your parents.
You'll get much better advice than I am giving you. Hang in there, but do find a good lawyer, it will be worth every penny you spend to navigate the system.
You need a lawyer well versed in Medicaid. The cost may able to be taken from your parents money. I think Medicaid OKs this.
With my Mom I took the money she had left and placed her in a NH private pay for two months. This gave me time to apply to medicaid and get them everything they needed. The 3rd month Medicaid took over.
If one or both end up in the hospital and rehab is required, do it. While in rehab have him/her evaluated for longterm care. If a LTC is attached to the rehab it will be an easy transition. Make sure you tell them you can no longer care for him/her. Their SS will go towards their care. I am just giving you the basics a lawyer will explain the criteria for your state. And hopefully help you to get thru the red tape.