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I take care of her and I have been for the last 5 1/2 years. She has a lot of family and not one person has come to check on her. One time back in February they called APS and nothing came of that. I do everything for her. I grocery shop and clean the house. She hasn’t done dishes in like six years. I do all her laundry, change her bedding, etc. When she first asked me to stay with her she offered to write me a big fat check and I said no, I don’t care about her money. Then a couple years ago she said she wanted to give me a couple hundred dollars a day to be her PCA. Still, I said no to that but she gives me her card to go and take care of stuff. I guess I should’ve been a little smarter and wrote everything down but I didn’t. So her bank froze all her accounts and told her I was stealing from her. She said no, she’s not and they said I’m not unlocking your account until you come to your senses. So, now I don’t know what to do for food, hygiene, laundry soap or whatever she wants. It’s her money! I made a promise to her and I don’t have any money to help, so I don’t know what to do at this point. I went to the Food Shelf to get her some food, hygiene products and soap as soon as she needed it. I mean, tell me what I’m doing wrong here because they’re putting my name in the mud and it just hurts. They have no idea what’s going on and I’ve been doing it for the last 5 1/2 years. Why is the bank just now saying something? I mean it’s just really ridiculous because I locked the card that’s how that started. I locked her card up by accident. When we went to the bank and she told them what I did, we didn’t know the people we were dealing with were not the people we normally deal with. They apparently don’t work there anymore. I guess all of a sudden it is what’s going on so I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to help her. I wanna help both of us, you know.

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Reply to MargaretMcKen
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Anxietynacy Aug 29, 2024
I hear ya Margaret, it depends what mood I'm in weather or not I answer.
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I'm going to say with what you are doing, it will raise red flags, and yes you should of kept all receipts and stuff.

Many people will question this because the world we live in most people don't help people like this without an underlying reason.


I have male friend that I've known forever. He helps a mental slow friend, does so much for him. APS got involved, and investigate and yes they found out exactly what I new, he is just helping him because he is a good person, so it does happen, just not near as much as people helping for there own benefit.

But I do understand why a red flag was raised in your case and his.

So has anyone told you what happens next? Or her, is APS going to investigate you. That's what I think will happen.

And I'm also thinking really is there that much that she needs to have to be for a few days , without being able for her to get into her check account? I feel like most people can go at least a week with the nessesities on hand?

Id say the best thing for you to do is start thinking of the last 5 years, write down an average of how much time you where with her and how much money was spent, and dig really hard for any receipts.
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You call APS and explain what happened. That the women needs excess to her account to by neccessities. If that means you need to quit doing for her, oh well, and I would. APS will figure it out and contact her family.

You did this for no pay? If she can offer u $200 a day, she can hire someone to do what you did.
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