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Mom is not real steady on her feet, because of visual issues (macular degeneration). I'm worried she's going to fall in the shower in her bedroom, and I'll be sleeping or on another floor of the house and not be able to hear her.

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There is nothing you can do to keep a person “not steady on her feet” from falling.

You can equip the shower with grab bars and a nonslip floor surface, you can remove slippery rugs, you can provide shoes with nonslip trends, you can take away all hard to see furnishings, and people will fall.

Motion sensing devices provide the earliest type of alert, but your mother will have fallen and be on the floor before you get to her.

My grandmother was once seated NEXT to a caregiver, stood up with the caregiver’s hand holding her, and fell over frontwards onto her face.

To secure her from constant falls, she had to have an aide with her at all times.

My mother needed to be placed in a residential facility because of her continuous falls. I was with her 24/7/365 until she went into care.
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cweissp Jul 2021
While my father was in AL and even SNC he would fall. He probably fell once a week. Anytime phone rang before 8 am and after 9 pm I would cringe because it was going to be the facility calling b/c dad fell again. Facilities can do all they can to mitigate the falls, but if the resident fails to cooperate the falls continue. One time dad was released from hospital to rehab - he fell within 2 hours of arriving at rehab and again the next morning - less than 24 hrs - geez!
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You can put some inexpensive security cameras throughout your home, so you can check on her through your phone any time you want to, or even some baby monitors. Just make sure that you are limiting her fall risk, by having the appropriate grab bars, mats, bench etc. in her shower, and removing any other obstacles that may be in her way, throughout the rest of the house.
But just know that if a person is a fall risk they are going to fall, whether you're around or not, and whether you have the right equipment or not. I was home 24/7 with my husband for the last 4 years of his life and he fell a lot, before he became bedridden. It just was what it was, and I was always just thankful that he never got seriously hurt.
Best wishes as you undertake this new challenge with your mom.
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Hopefully you have a computer and a smart phone so adding a nanny cam is basically the next step. There are many to choose from and they are as easy to install as a Bluetooth speaker. I bought three Zmodo cameras with night vision with adjustable sensing areas for the living room, kitchen and back porch. I added door and window sensors, motion detection floor level night lights. I did not purchase a monthly plan.
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My brother was confused and would not use safety devices.
He did not recognize the recommended bedside commode over the toilet and would not utilize the shower chair or walker or doorbell “call button” etc.
We got the bedpad that alarms when the person is not on the pad and had to hide it and the invalid pads under the sheets ( otherwise everything was used as a blanket).
It was not perfect , but at least I could check the camera and/or arrive in time to handle whatever situation I found.
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Try not to worry too much. It'll make you crazy. Elderly people do have falls. It's a fact and there is very little you can do to prevent it. Well, besides the obvious of removing rugs and things like that. Once you've done that, you're just going to have to try to relax and just keep your fingers crossed. You are NOT going to be with her every moment of every day so do not put that kind of expectation and pressure on yourself. If the shower is a big issue, hire an aid to give her one a few times a week and make it off limits otherwise.
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If your mom is unstable on her feet, she may benefit from a walker.

In the bathroom, install grab bars that have high contrast to the rest of the bathroom (black bars in white bathroom) since her focal/central vision will not easily see grab bars the same color as the bathroom. It would also be wise to have a handheld shower attachment and a shower chair in the shower she uses. You could easily install a baby monitor - audio only in bedrooms and bathrooms - so you can hear her if you are in a different part of the house.
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I agree:
- a walker is necessary to keep mom steadier;
- add grab bars to bath/shower and next to toilet;
- provide a shower chair;
- remove throw rugs; and
- declutter to give mom enough room to maneuver with the walker.

You may want to have mom invest in one of those fall alert systems and cameras to help you keep an eye on her while you're in another area of the home.

While dad fell once a week while he was alive; mom on the other hand does better and averages maybe 2 falls/year. She too is unsteady on her feet due to back issues with damage to the in nerves her legs - one leg in particular is affected. Her falls are usually due to not paying attention - such as turning before she gets one of her feet firmly planted before making her turn - although the last fall was because her shoes weren't fastened.

All you can do is provide as safe an environment for her to mitigate any falls. No one can prevent all falls. I wish you the best.
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Even if you have monitors in every room, they are not going to prevent falls. If you are sleeping, you won't be aware of the fall. If you're on another floor, even if you can see her starting to fall, you can't get there before it happens! It wouldn't hurt to have some monitors, so you will at least know if she's fallen when you check, but as many noted, falls will happen, even when someone is right next to them. Preventative measures can help, such as removing many obstacles and scatter rugs. Easily tipped chairs should be removed as well. My mother fell (more like a tumble) several times in the MC hall, and they only have the very low knap carpeting. She did end up on the floor in her room once, with the rocking chair on it's side (fairly good sized, not that easy to tip!) I had them move it from her room to storage and had YB pick it up.

There's no mention of dementia, so for your shower fears, can you ask her to at least tell you when she's going to shower before she goes? I wouldn't hover over her while she's in there, but stay closer at hand, just in case so you can assist. Placing grab bars, a shower chair and a hand held shower head might reduce chances of falls while showering. Make sure any bath mats have a good non-slip backing. Sometimes as they get older, the backing gets hard and cracked - that would lead to slipping, esp on a wet floor.
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My mom is 91 and has been a fall risk for years. I had to move in with her and I hear her every time she falls. She has had a rough week. Four falls in her bedroom and bathroom. She is so bruised. She has dry mouth and is always up and down to get water and back up again to go to the bathroom. I took her cups out of her room so she can't drink. You will be surprised how you hear everything they do and especially the falls. It's like having a newborn. You have a mother's ear again. Another thing that helps is one of my little dogs who sleeps with her. If something happens Bella starts barking. Best of luck to you and your mom.
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