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I plan a day.My Mom is 99, in great health. Does not even use a walker unless someone reminds her. I take her to lunch, to the dentist, doctor hairdresser on my day off.I am An RN who works with Dementia and Alzheimer's patients, yes you heard me right.
I do not remember dropping my mother off and not thinking that is it. She tells me no one knows who I really am. Why I got divorced, what I did 20 years ago, on and on and on.

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Your profile says your mom has age-related impairments. Do you think she may have the beginnings of dementia? Does it help at all to treat her as you would the dementia patients you work with?

I'm not sure that figuring out "why" is always useful, unless it helps us figure out how to deal with the behavior. When did this behavior start? Has she always been somewhat like this?

Who is the "I" in the sentences above, by the way? Is she saying that no one know the real russellstover52, or is she complaining that no one understands her?

If Mom doesn't have dementia and can still reason, what happens if you say, "Mom, I need a pleasant lunch today. I'm not going to talk about that subject", and change to a different subject?
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Has she always been like this, a complainer? Because as you probably already know, once a complainer, always a complainer. Or maybe sge is confabulating stories she's heard from other residents to get a rise out of you. I can't imagine that she has lot to talk about, so is maybe is making up stories? Some on here have mentioned that their elders have tried to tell their kids their deepest darkest secrets, to clear their consiounces. Maybe she's trying to do that? I know my FIL told my husband about an affair he had, when my husband was a small child, something my husband wished he had held back, as it does change the way you think about them afterwards.
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I am so good with my patients and their families and can figure everything out for then, lol
Thank you for taking the time to comment.
Mom just called me. Told me she had to vent and I deserve a apology.
Thank you so much i will tell her I need a quiet time when we go to the dentist next week and lunch.
I need to practice what i peach I guess.
I have been taking care of her for 16 years now.
She has not lived with me but i have made sure she has had everything.
She is taken very good care of and maybe i should take very good care of me . I think i will give mtself space and take your advice.
Thankbyou and i am here for you
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Do not visit her alone. They behave better when others are around.
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